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Spank a 13 month old?

My son was digging in the trash can and his dad caught him, took it away and told him no. He went straight back to it so dad gave him a swat on the butt, not enough to hurt just to maybe scare him a little. He cried about it and was mad for a while, but he sure didn't go back to play with the trash again.

I know some don't believe in "spanking" at all, I do though. I just don't know if he is too young for it, even though it did work.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:02 PM on Oct. 7, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (16)
  • I think thats too young. I am not against it but don't think it needs to be used for something like that, he'll be doing MUCH worse later that also doesn't deserve spankings but redirection. I don't know. I think IF my son ever gets spanked, it will be for things that endangers his life like running in the street or laying in the middle of the street ( for some reason I did that at 6 years old ) - things like that - not while they are learning what everything is and exploring the world. NOPE
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:05 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • i agree with the first
    tiffandgene2009

    Answer by tiffandgene2009 at 1:07 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • a baby that young doesn't understand spanking
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • Great. So now, he has learned that touching trash = pain. If he cried, it hurt.
    Good job!
    NightPhoenix

    Answer by NightPhoenix at 1:14 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • He cries about everything, it didn't hurt him. He was probably crying because he was mad at his dad, or upset that he couldn't play with the trash.



    OP
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:19 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • Spanking is never right. It can stop bad behavior, sometimes. It is a form of punishment and punishment does not teach good behavior. When parents use spanking and other forms of punishment with their children it is called authoritarian parenting. Over time being an authoritarian parent does not work.

    Authoritative parenting is the ideal form of parenting. Google authoritarian and authoritative parenting and read more about it.

    Without Spanking or Spoiling by Elizabeth Crary is a great toddler parenting book. She has a website called Star Parenting.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 1:20 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • In my opinion, spanking isn't an effective form of discipline and should be avoided. Have I been driven to it? Absolutely. Did I hate myself afterward? Absolutely. Will I spank again? I hope not but like all of us, I'm human, I lose my temper, lose my cool, lose my composure, and at times, lose the ability to take a deep breath and approach the situation with my head.

    Your son is simply exploring his environment and redirection along with a firm "no" should suffice in that situation. You can also let him help you put something in the trash so he learns what it's for.
    twinclubmom

    Answer by twinclubmom at 1:25 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • Alright, I'll go against all those trying to make you feel bad and say I think spanking works. I was thought at this age they need concrete consequences. Spanking works. Obvoiusly, don't beat your child! And don't spank over everything. But when it comes to safety, you don't always have time to repeated redirect your child. If a firm no isn't enough, back it up with a light swat so your child knows you are serious and understands there is a direct consequence to this behavior. I also would only spank if you catch in the act. Again, for that direct link.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:30 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • You should spank your 4 month old for crying too. That will make them stop crying. They'll associate crying with pain. Right?

    WTF is wrong with you? Don't spank your toddler for being curious and ignoring your wishy washy no. If you say no, and he goes back to it, you didn't make it clear that it was a no, or he needs some more repetition. If you issue a firm no, and demonstrate with your disapproval firmly, he's going to listen. He's not a stupid dog that needs to have things hit into him (and even dogs respond better to positive behavior reinforcement, how much more so your child). You're using spanking to do behavior modification.

    I've got no issue with preschoolers being spanked. When you've got a child being curious, that can barely toddle, you shouldn't be spanking them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • It blows my mind that the only concrete consequences people can come up with is spanking.
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 1:39 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

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