Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

hard question...

how do you tell a 3 and 4 yr old that you and daddy are separating?

Answer Question

Asked by idebusashes at 3:13 PM on Oct. 8, 2009 in Kids' Health

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Wow! This is hard. Maybe you can say something like. Daddy is going to live in a different house. He is still your daddy but he won't live here with mommy anymore. Reassure them that they are still loved by both of you.

    Answer by Jguevara at 3:19 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • My son had just turned 4 a few weeks before my ex husband and I separated. We sat him down together on the couch and explained to him that Mommy & Daddy were going to be friends but couldnt live together. We explained to him that just becuase Daddy wouldnt be living in our house any more didnt mean he didnt love him. We named a bunch of people close to Jaydin (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins...) and reminded him that they each (by name) loved Jaydin very much even though they didnt live in our house

    Answer by Jaydin_Makenna at 3:19 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • jaydin makenna - i would loooove to talk to them like that.. but truth is.. im leaving b/c my ex is very controlling and abusive. i dont feel like i will have that opportunity. if it were up to him i wouldnt be going. i have plans to leave when he is gone at work. then, once i am safe i will be contacting him in regards to custody and visitation. most likely it will just be me addressing their concerns =(

    Answer by idebusashes at 3:23 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • thank you jguevara. i will definitely tell them that.

    Answer by idebusashes at 3:25 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • oh, I'm in almost the same situation. I'm going to see if I can get access to a mental health counselor (perhaps through one of the many groups who help abused women) to answer that question when I finally do it. No advice here, just best of wishes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:11 AM on Oct. 14, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.