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I have never heard this before.

Ok. So I am 6 months pregnant with my second child. While having dinner with my friends I jokingly asked who would be planning the baby shower this time. A friend tells me that I can not have a shower because you only have showers with the first child. I have never heard this before and I am a little disappointed. My first child is a boy and I am currently pregnant with a boy. A lot of my son's things can't be handed down because they are gender specific. I need a lot of little girls stuff. Plus, I was really looking forward to the girlie shower. Has anyone else every heard this? Is it true? I hope not because I really want to have the girlie shower. And if they refuse to throw one, would it be totally in bad taste for me to throw one for myself?

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:54 PM on Oct. 8, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (20)
  • Sorry I meant for that to say I am currently pregnant with a girl.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:55 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I have heard that... but I think it depends on the situation- how far apart they are, gender, how big your first one was. I plan on having one with my second child, but I didn't one with my first. It's one of those socially touchy things.

    Answer by Annabel1809Lee at 9:58 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • One shower should be sufficient. You were lucky enough to have that. And I have only heard of people having one showere unless it has been YEARS since their last baby. And yes it would be in very bad taste for you to plan your own baby shower. It sounds to me like you just want the gifts.

    Answer by QandA at 9:58 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I have heard that and no one threw one for me with my second child, but luckily I had a boy the second time too. I think it is one of the traditional things about showers, like guys not being there, ya know? I know plenty of friends who have had showers for each of their babies. Ask a close friend if they would mind throwing one for you and only invite those who you would know would be up for it... you know, those who are not "traditional" about it.

    Answer by mom2BOYZnDad at 10:01 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • i had one with my first one and she was a girl and i didnt want one with my second cuz she was a girl and now im pregnant with a boy and my mother n law is going to throw me one.

    Answer by mommaburns at 10:01 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • Many people think one shower only (especially older generations). However many people have showers for every single baby! I am sure there will be someone who will throw you a shower! I think it is not a good idea to throw your own. Maybe you can have a party after the baby is born to "meet the baby.". Most likely people will bring you gifts anyway. I am amazed at the people who bring gifts when they visit in the hospital.

    Answer by micheledo at 10:03 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I think asking someone to have a baby shower for you is tacky.

    Answer by QandA at 10:04 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I had a HUGE first shower for my girl (everyone we knew or my MIL knew was there). I did have a smaller one-very close friends and family only. My second was a boy so I got mostly clothes and things for his room. I already had all the big stuff so I got lots of fun little boy things. I say go for it-if they won't throw you one, you do it. If you want one there is nothing wrong with having a second shower.

    Answer by Carajust at 10:04 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I think you mean your first is a boy and you know or think your second is going to be a girl? To ask or be resentful for not having a baby shower in today's economy, imho, isn't right. The people you think would come or should come, I'm sure you don't know all of their finances down to the last penny every payday.

    Bleach your older child's non gender specific clothes and blankets to brighten them up. My first baby was a boy and second a girl. My son was a summer baby and my daughter was a winter baby. There were still some clothes and blankets that I could use from the oldest my son for my second baby my daughter. I'm sure you'll get gifts when baby is born even without a shower ahead of time.

    I don't think you were treated negatively because your friends/family don't love this new baby and that they do not want to honor baby and you. But basically demanding gifts just doesn't sit well in today's world.


    Answer by lfl at 10:05 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

  • I've always heard one shower, sorry.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:09 PM on Oct. 8, 2009

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