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When do you stop making excuses? (Continuing another question about abusive relationships)

When do you stop making excuses for staying in an abusive relationship? Seriously just how bad does it need to get before you say Screw it, I am worth more? Should you allow yourself to be hit, emotionally abused or whatever just because you don't have an education? A job, a car? I am sorry, WTF kind of thinking is that??
And yes, I WAS abused. The answer is simple. Get up, get out. Get help. You can do this.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Oct. 11, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • i agree! i wanted to say from the other question earlier that there was plenty of times that i COULD have been in an abusive relationship, but i saw it coming and left before anything happened. its having the strength to walk out knowing you are better than that and that you deserve better than that! for your family and for yourself...no women deserves that kind of treatment!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Now, I don't agree with THOSE being the reasons that someone would stay in an abusive relationship.  I was working at the Village Pantry and this chick would come in and chat all the time.  Well, she came in one night and her face was TORE UP!  I asked her what happened and she told me that her boyfriend had beaten her up.  I felt SO horrible for her!  She came in again about 2 weeks later and I asked her what had happened with her and her boyfriend.  She said "everyone keeps telling me to leave him but hey, I've got money and look at the car I drive".  I was seriously appalled by that. 

    Katrina3016

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 12:24 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Oh, and I have been BOTH.  The person being abused and the abuser.  My husband and I had a very volatile relationship during our first couple of years together.  A LOT of hitting, emotional abuse, so forth.  We laugh now about how crazy we both were then and how lucky we are that we both changed for the better and how awesome our relationship is but this is RARELY what happens.  It's definitely not something I would recommend someone else try and do.  It takes a lot of work and both partners have to be committed to changing damn near everything about themselves. 

    Katrina3016

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 12:27 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Sorry, I didn't mean to take over your post here, lol.  I must be in a talkative mood tonight, lol.

    Katrina3016

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 12:28 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Yeah I know. I posted one of those questions. I was abused myself and this girl at work tells everyone how her ex husband beat the shit out of her and now she's with some guy whos up for rape, has raped her and beat her and she says she weak because the sex is good. She has two kids and it makes me sick....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • who said those were the reasons some1 was stayin in a relationship.not everyone has that confidence and courage and strength to just get up get out.not having a car a job or w.e isnt always the reason.some people are mentally fucked up in the head from childhood which causes them to feel a certain way and some people are just scared not every1 is a hard ass and can say fuck this and leave.some people are in denial.you cant judge some1 because of what there going through.you can try and help them you cant put them down for it.what if being abused is all they've ever known and been around.how do you expect them to just get up and leave if thats what they grew up seeing,hearing,and knowing?
    Desi2Sweet

    Answer by Desi2Sweet at 12:38 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Desi, everything you listed is a FEEBLE EXCUSE to allow the victim to keep being the victim.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • There are so many of us that will help you if you just ASK.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:47 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • no its not an excuse.if some1 is messed up in the head because of what there immune 2 thats there fault?
    Desi2Sweet

    Answer by Desi2Sweet at 12:56 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • once some1 is abused there lives are changed 4ever, whether in a good or bad way.they r never the same
    Desi2Sweet

    Answer by Desi2Sweet at 12:56 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

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