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I'm really wanting to divorce my husband am I wrong for feeling this way?

He just lies and its ridiculous. 1st started with a gift I found before we moved in together he said the gifts, are sent 2 every Veteran. Wow a lie it came from a young lady he had interest in her. Continued to talk to call her, email, and text her even after the marriage. I said well why didnt you marry her his response was I dont have those feelings about her like that anymore she didnt want to be together so I left it alone. Next, we were mad at each other and decided we needed time to get our head straight, he started talking 2 a young lady that reported 2 me the same day.Sending her texts about sexual acts he wanted 2 perform on her. I found his cell phone and read them. Ok we moved on from that.Now most recently he reached out 2 a friend from 6yrs ago asking her why she sent a letter ending their friendship and he would've rathered cried in front of her instead of alone in his room. He doesnt know why I want 2 leave.HELP

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Asked by havemore at 1:48 AM on Oct. 11, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (11)
  • he is a sex addict
    wait... or 1-800-newlife prayers
    so sorry he is so weak!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:51 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • It doesn't sound like it's necessarily a sex addiction so much as he doesn't feel satisfied with the emotional support aspect of your relationship. He's reaching out for sex, true... but he also wrote to an old friend about wanting her friendship still and wishing she had had the heart to contfront him in person. This is serious. No, you're not wrong for feeling that way. Would he be willing to get counciling? It's not all him... he doesn't feel supported or respected or loved or SOMETHING enough by you... you could still save the relationship if you want to. If you don't then it's time to say goodbye.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 1:57 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Find a good marriage counselor and start with that. After you figure out what the problems are deep down....b/c there is always some underlying problem with marital problems.....then decide if the two of you are ready to work on your marriage or if you are not. All of the stuff you are talking about is superficial. You need to figure out what the real issues are. It's not about sex. It's about some emotional connection between the two of you that's missing. If you had it, he wouldn't be doing this to you. You need to get it back. However, it sounds like something might have always been missing since this started before you got married. So, working on your emotional connection, friendship and love for each other sounds like it would be the first step. You can only have a successul marriage if you have a good, solid foundation. Work on that and start doing it by going to counseling. Good luck.

    Answer by noahsmomma09 at 2:08 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • maybe try being more exciting,no offense

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • I think he is a player and that he is just a cheatin dirty dick mother f**ker. I would leave his dirty self also. GL and I hope one day soon you find the man you have always wanted and that things will go as plan.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:29 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Leave him or you will end up like me. I'm going to pm you.

    Answer by kimikylemama at 2:54 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • seems like... he's a teenie bopper doing childhood things.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:59 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Oh for goodness sakes, the silly man just sounds emotionally needy. The first instance was just bad judgment on his part and he should have told you the truth but he thought it would start a fight and lied. Men lie to us over little things to keep peace sometimes. The second instance sounds like you were separated (even if only emotionally) to get your heads straight. To men, that means separated and they go immediately out to play. The last one was just dumb. He's an idiot. You should know that by now but he doesn't sound like a bad guy, just stupid. Look, I'm not bashing but I'd be finding out from him why he feels the need to find female friends when he should be turning to you. Quit getting upset with him (I know it's hard to do) and just listen. He needs something in life and he should be finding it with you and not elsewhere. BE his friend and listen so you both can figure it out. You two are just not on the same page

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:50 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • DIVORCE!!!!!!!!!

    Answer by My3RaysofSun at 9:51 AM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • You're not wrong, this serious and not that he is just emotionally needy, dump him now before it gets worse.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

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