Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

why are there so many deadbeat dads out there?

is it something in the water? a memo I missed? a new strain of Swine Flu? It seems like every woman I talk to has or knows a man that has abandoned his responsibilities as father and no lingers in the deadbeat zone. these so called "men" should have their balls removed. Oh and that also goes for the deadbeat "moms" of the world too! they are also out there leaving children without a second thought. Remove their ovaries and put them in a jar on a shelf as a reminder of those they have chosen to ignore. It makes sick.

Answer Question

Asked by missv66 at 12:51 PM on Oct. 11, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Must be the type of friends you have. They marry or sleep with losers. A few of my friends are divorced and their ex's pay support and share custody of the kids. These women don't do everything they can to keep the kids away from dad either.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • some ppl are just stupid like that. they are ppl who dont care about anyone but themselves. it's sad.

    Answer by mandielynn23 at 1:33 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • There tends to be a relaxed look at responsibility with some folks. Sad. In my case, my x looked at it as giving ME money, not that he was providing for his children. He even told the Judge he would not give me money. The Judge wisely said, "Ok, then give it to the clerk and he'll send it to her!:" LOL Of course my x didn't find it funny and refused to pay until a couple of years ago. I kept nagging everyone from the Governor on down to make him pay and they finally did so ladies, never give up. File for cs bc they have to pay it some day and with interest on the arrearage they build up. It can come out of their tax refund or the sale of a house or assets or even their social security if they get old. You still get it.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:06 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • Ummm probably cuz there mommies and daddies spoiled them too much and didn't teach them responsibilities


    Answer by looovemybabies at 2:10 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • My ex husband says he ignores his kids because it hurts his heart to talk to them or see causes him to miss them all over what he is really saying is out of sight out of mind and doesn't want reminders.


    Answer by wheresthewayout at 3:21 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • I agree whole-heartedly with "looovemybabies". She is right on! Moms and Dads that give in to every want and demand, don't teach any responsibility, do everything for them, spoil them rotten, never making them share, play fair, don't pick them up everytime they whine, don't discipline them to have self-control, take their side always, not teach them what the word "NO" means and stick with it consistently, and just spoil them till nobody, not even themselves want to be around them....that's why there are so many selfish, irresponsible, dead-beat dads and moms out there. The solution? Teach your children to be responsible, honest, caring, loving and disciplined. Think about your future grandchildren! Also, to "wherethewayout", my ex said the same thing and he has always been a "dead-beat dad" who was spoiled rotten!

    Answer by 1daughter5sons at 3:46 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • They have no education, no sense of responsibilty and no ambition other than to have fun. What do you expect? And they should not be fathers. Any girl or woman who doesn't use birth control and has no idea what will happen if they have a kid with a dead beat is ALSO a dead beat. The key to a happy life is to first get an education...hopefully a college degree. Then, make sure you know who you are dating...then don't have babies without being married to a normal guy. And let me stress NORMAL> Because, guys who sit around drinking, watching late night TV, playing video games and looking for sex (and you know that's all they care about )instead of working hard is an abnormal, lazy jerk.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • hit that nail right on the head. And it doesn't stop at deadbeats...its a social disease.

    Answer by missv66 at 5:00 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • because society allows it. Because there are no real consequences for not taking care of your children. People think it would cost too much to jail people, and many end up working under the table so their wages aren't clocked. I personally think that we should give a max of 1 year to 'get things under control'...meaning get a job, so that you can pay support. IF you don't, then you will be put in jail for 6 months. Obviously this isn't going to have an effect on your job...since you dont' have one, or your responsibilities...because you ignore them anyway. After getting out of jail, you have 6 months to get employment, if you don't (or if you are working under the table, you will be put in jail for 5 years. During this time in jail (both the 6 months and the 5 years). You will have MINIMAL things...because you obviously had NO care at all for what your child needed or you should live the same way. (cont)

    Answer by ProudSingleMum at 9:00 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

  • You get enough food to keep you alive. You get clothes for 2 days. You get 1 set of sheets. You get 1 towel/washcloth/bar of soap. This is ALL you get. You will then WORK for everything else you want/need. And of that money (and yes I am aware how LITTLE it is). 75% will go to your child(ren). Meaning, if you bust your butt for 8 hrs every day, and you make $8, then you get $2 and your child gets $6. (this is out of sheer GRACE...nothing more...because you actually deserve NOTHING for your work, since you (technically) owe the tax payers. Speaking of which...when you DO get out of jail, you are NOT allowed to claim yourself while you work. YOu will mark ZERO dependents. And therefore your entire tax refund will go to your child. When you've paid back all that you owe, then your tax refunds will go to the state to pay back their care for you for the time you spent in jail. If you quit your job or lose your job....

    Answer by ProudSingleMum at 9:04 PM on Oct. 11, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in General Parenting
How did you react?

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
postive test!!!