• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I dont know if I like him anymore??????

Help. I have been married for 5 years and I am finding that I dislike him more and more everyday. I am committed to our relationship and don't know how to get over this. Help.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Oct. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • stop looking for all the small things, i so understand where you are coming from, but to get over this you are going to have to find a medium balance.. YOU need to start acting like ewhen you first met, hold his hand, pintch his butt, ask him out of a date, try to see him in a diff light than you hae been..
    ArlieBeeMee

    Answer by ArlieBeeMee at 3:54 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • It's called teh seven year itch. We all go through times like these, where we wonder if we made the right decision, wonder if we're still in love, wonder if it would be better with someone else. Talk to him about the things that are bothering you and weather the storm. People give up too easily. Keep talking and keep working at it. My seven year itch lasted about 6 months or so. Just ride it out and keep talking and trying to reconnect.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 3:55 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • It's really hard when you go from being husb & wife to mom & dad... try to remember what it was that attracted you to him in the first place and try to get back there however you can. Maybe you don't have enough one on one time (kid free)? Parenthood is hard on marriages... gl!
    momrocks1000

    Answer by momrocks1000 at 3:58 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • Does that mean you are cheating yourself out of being with Mr Right bc you are committed to a relationship with a man that isn't right for you? That just seems wrong to me. Personally, if my partner didn't like me I'd tell him, see ya.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:36 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • Ati 13 - I don't know if we "all" go through the 7 year itch, I never did. Sure there are times when I don't like dh, usually it is something that he has said or done to make me angry. But I ALWAYS love him. I do agree when you say that people give up too easily. It seems that alot of marriages fail these days because the involved parties just don't want to make the effort and work it out. OP, try and remember what it is that made you fall in love with your husband in the first place. Try and talk to him about your feelings, I wouldn't include the part about not liking him, but be honest otherwise, he might just surprise you.
    emnasmom

    Answer by emnasmom at 4:48 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • emnasmom, I didn't mean that everyone falls out of love. I never stopped loving my husband either, but it's really common to wonder about that. Many people DO feel like they fall out of love, only to realize how much they really do still love their spouse in the middle of a divorce. But by then it's too late. I never wondered if I still loved my husband, but I did wonder sometimes if love was enough.

    And maybe "everyone" was too strong a generalization. I take it back... MANY, not everyone. :) Thanks for pointing that out.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 4:54 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

  • I've been married for 3 years, but have known my husband 11 years. You do get annoyed some times and start to question things, but take a step back. Breath. Try new things. Maybe you need some "me" time. Maybe he needs some "me" time. When there are kids involved it gets even tougher. Hang in there and seek couples counseling if necessary. Marriage is work. Add kids into the mix! You have to schedule sex and everything. lol
    mamasarias

    Answer by mamasarias at 5:20 PM on Oct. 14, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.