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I'm having major issues with my childs teacher...

Almost everyday my child comes home with something interesting the teacher said or did. The other day she wouldn't let him go to the bathroom because he didn't have to go when the whole class went. Another day, she yelled at him for putting his head down...I say if he feels the need to put his head down in class, it's because she is not engaging him enough in the class room. Maybe she's boring him to death. And one more...he came home telling me he needed snacks for snack time. So I prepared a Ziploc bag full of snacks, enough for 8 days atleast. He came home and told me she threw it all out!!! WTH! I was livid. So now I have to remember to send in a snack just for him everyday. I'm not understaning this lady! She's young, this is 1st grade and I think she's talks to these kids as if they were older.


Asked by Anonymous at 9:55 AM on Oct. 15, 2009 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • hmmm....First I would suggest writing out a list of things that you like about this teacher. Then, I would request to have a conference with her. When you gently confront her, start off with the things you like about her so she doesnt feel attacked and then, ask questions in a gentle manner like what is your bathroom policy? Legally a teacher cannot tell a child that they can't go to the bathroom. Get a note from your pediatrician if you have to saying that he has to be let go every time he asks to go. Ask her why his snack got thrown out and ask her why he's getting in trouble. You need to talk these things out with her first and get her side of the story. If this doesn't work, then go over head to the principal and talk to the principal about it.

    Answer by lowencope at 10:02 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • Have you talked to her about any of this or any of the other parents to compare "notes" or the principal?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • Go sit in class for a day. You can go and sit in the back of the class and observe. I encourage all parents to do this.

    Answer by Gailll at 10:01 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • There is two sides to every story, becareful you are only hereing one side. Who knows maybe they just came back from the bathroom. Maybe she is teaching him, and he needs to respect that. My son went to the bathroom and took forever, he was hanging out in there so he didn't have to work, he just started kindergarten, if you don't nip it in the bud, YOU WILL KEEP MAKING EXCUSES FOR HIM, AND THAT IS NOT GOOD AT ALL, I was like you my oldest is 13 and she is the most stubborn. I have 4 kids, 3 get snacks every day. Nothing new to me. She should have never threw the food out, and I never heard of someone sending in 5 days worth of food. My kids would give them away, or try eating them all. JJ See the teacher immediatly before you feel worst about her, and give her the benifit of a doubt. You never know you might like her.

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:04 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • I have a 1st grader and I realize that his account is not always the most accurate account of an event. Why not talk to her? Meanwhile, I know that he is supposed to go to the bathroom at recess, as there were simply too many disruptions during the initial few weeks when they went at will. They CAN go during class time, but they will be docked 'classroom money'. I would expect a teacher to tell him off for not listening and putting his head down during class time. I do not care if the lesson is boring - my son is expected to behave. I have no idea what the snack thing was all about, but I would expect snacks to be sent daily, so I'm sure she thought that was the case and that she was throwing out leftovers (she may have even asked 'are you finished with this?' - as I said, my first grader's account of things often leaves out important details).
    Your kid is old enough to be responsible for these small things at school.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:09 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • I agree with the two sides to every story bit too. Sorry but the way you put it, it sounds like you are not informed about your childs criteria and that is your responsibility as a parent. It is also up to you to make the effort to know when snack time is, go to school cirriculum nights, reinforce the teachers rules about bathroom breaks (use it or lose it). You should have been getting notes about all of these things already. Now why would she throw his snacks out? Hmmm.

    You should definitely have a conference. You obviously have internet and I bet all teachers have email.

    You need to get with the program for the sake of your son. If you side with the teacher on basic behavior rules then your child will have only one behave. How good that will be for him.

    Answer by 3gigglemonsters at 10:23 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • I'm a certified teacher.

    1st - I agree with the teacher on the putting his head down thing. That is disrespectful. It is impossible for a teacher to not bore an entire room of students. Each kid is different and interested in different things. You need to teach him to be respectful of his teacher. Also, when we teachers have a student that's always putting their head down, we usually think it means they aren't getting enough sleep or eating breakfast.
    2nd - The snack issue is probably due to the school's policy to reduce bugs and pests. Very few schools will allow any food to be stored in a classroom over night. So, parents are probably expected to send daily snacks, but you should have received a note explaining the snack policy to have avoided the confusion.
    3rd - Most schools are strict about bathroom trips & elementary kids are expected to go as a group.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 10:31 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • cont'd

    I was always quick to let a student go to the bathroom when they needed to, unless they had had a bathroom break with in the past 30 min. Though, my principal confronted me on the issue a few times. Her keeping your son from going to the bathroom after providing a classroom bathroom break may have nothing to do with her and may be her following the school's policy. You should read your son's school handbook and see what their bathroom policy is. I also think in the handbook you will find the snack issue and the putting your head down in class issue both addressed.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 10:35 AM on Oct. 15, 2009

  • I am an elementary aide and agree with most of the AP's. There are always two sides to every story, and if a child has deemed that a teacher is being "mean" to him, he will only tell you the side that supports his behavior. Why does he need to put his head down in class? Is he having attention or focusing issues? Also, most teachers have built in bathroom breaks, there must have been a reason why she wouldn't let him go at that time, possibly they just all came back from the break or they were transitioning into another activity and his request would have interrupted the routine. I know that in our school snacks cannot be stored for a week, I send a snack bag with my dd every day, there is no reason to send for an entire week. If you are having issues, you need to talk to the teacher directly, I'm sure that will help clarify any questions you may have.

    Answer by emnasmom at 11:00 AM on Oct. 15, 2009