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OKay I'm freaking out aboutm y son seeing a Psychiatrist...

Someone tell me I am doing the right thing please. he has behavior issues and it's driving me nuts but what if it's just my fault and not his. what if I take him to this doctor and they put him on unnecessary meds. What if I take him and they say nothing is wrong it's just me. I was raised to believe that Psychiatrist were quacks, that's a whole 'nother story though... So my parents are jumping down my throat saying that i am just going to make things worse by taking him... I need to call for an appt but now all of the sudden I am scared to. Should I just give it more time and see what happens? he is a little over 5. We have been having trouble since he was about 2.5

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:45 AM on Oct. 16, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I think you are doing the right thing. If your son is having problems it is best to have him evaluated and see what is going on, and how he can be helped. Not all people are prescribed drugs, and as a parent you have the right to say NO to drugs. A good doctor will listen to you, observe your child and discuss their findings with you, as well as set up a treatment plan/goals for your child and work with both of you to get things worked out.
    I do know how you feel, I just made an appointment for my son to see a PHD- he has Autism and has anger/behavior issues. We are at the point where nothing we do is working and he needs professional help- and we need help to figure out what is the best way to work with him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • Let me tell you, that is normal behavior of children in those age groups. I work in a daycare and I also have a 4 yr old. There is never a day when any child behaves perfectly. I dont believe in giving meds, to me that is drugging them so they will be inactive. Wait it out a little, usually by age 6, they will distinguish whats right and wrong. Just do what feels right for you.
    hazeleyezmommy

    Answer by hazeleyezmommy at 10:49 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • You are doing the right thing by having him evaluated. Psychiatrists are not quacks, they are highly traind medical doctors. It's best to take children to a psychiatrist recommended by your pediatrician.

    Authoratative parenting is the most effective style. If you have been using an authoritarian style of parenting based on punishment then you are part of the problem. Punishment does not teach good behavior. Many kids learn to ignor and resent their parent. Behavior problems lead to more punishment leads to more behavior problems. Go to google to read more about authoratative and authoratarian parenting.

    Two good books are Without Spanking or Spoiling by Elizabeth Crary and How to Talk So Kids Will Listen. You can find out more about each by doing a google search.

    I hope things go well for you and your son.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 10:54 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • Take him back to the doctors and tell him you do not want him on drugs. He can tell you of someone who works with kids behavior problems. (you might be able just to call your doc.office)
    If this Doctor is not listening take him to another doctor. Ask around if anyone knows a good ped.doc.
    There is help out there and meds. are not the answer.

    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 10:55 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • It's irresponsible to say you flat out don't 'believe' in drugs. Yes, drugs are given too often for ADHD. We don't even know what this child's diagnosis may be. If he has bipolar disorder he has to be on drugs. It's dangerous for children not to be. When they are manic they jump off of things because they believe they can't be hurt. They can do things that causes life-threatening injuries.

    There are other things that are important to diagnose and treat in childhood. Many mental illnesses are imbalances of chemicals in the brain. You wouldn't say 'I don't believe in drugs' and not give your diabetic child insulin! You would probably have your child taken away.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:02 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • gailll- we are using a reward and 'punishment' method for him. 1-2-3 magic along with Making Your kids Mind without Losing Yours. I have also read 'Raising the Strong Willed Child' and Grace based Parenting... We do not spank, well once when he darted out into the parking lot he got swatted once on the thigh... Like last night he refused to get in the tub and had a melt down so by the time he came around to getting in there was no time to play just wash and bed. If he gets all of his stickers at school that week on Friday we go out for ice cream...

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • Obviously, reward and punishment isn't working. Authoritarian parenting doesn't work for kids with behavior problems. Try not to close your mind and read more.

    Without Spanking or Spoiling is not focused on not spanking. I wish it didn't have that name. The same author has a book called Love & Limits that is good but not as good. She has developed a parenting course called Star Parenting. I hope you take a look at it. Here is a parenting chart she has developed.

    http://www.starparent.com/popup.html

    My youngest son has bipolar disorder and a 80 IQ. I've read just about every book, probably over 100, have gone to conferences, and even went to grad school for a masters in counseling psychology program with a minor in family studies to learn all I could to help him. I'm trying to share my expertise, what took tens of thousands of dollars to learn.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:34 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • I made an appt with a psychologist instead. We, the parents, are going next Thursday to meet the doctor. He will take a history from us and ask us questions. there will be a follow up visit the following week were the psychologist will see my son before referring him to a second doctor, either a Therapist or a Psychiatrist which ever we as a group feel is best. I talked to the receptionist about my feelings on meds vs. the more desirable (for us) alternative therapy and behavior modification and she said they would be able to work with me. I'm still scared but this place sounds much less scary than the first one I called...

    gailll- I am looking at the site you gave now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • you need to be open and listen to what the professional is telling you. (this may include drugs....may not) You may even find out it is very fixable. Take him , get him well.....that is after all the job of a parent to watch over their kids and do what you can to make them well.............You need to have an open mind and remember this is about your CHILD NOT YOU...........good luck.
    justgrape723

    Answer by justgrape723 at 12:42 PM on Oct. 16, 2009

  • justgrape: i am not adamantly against meds. I know they have there place and some people do in fact need them. I just don't want my 5 year old to be seen one time and then put on drugs when I know there are other alternatives that can be tried first.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on Oct. 16, 2009