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Question about past habits...please no bashing, i dont need it and i've probably already heard it

o.k. so I used to be a self-mutilator. I would burn myself, cut myself what-ever I needed to do to feel better.(If you've never done it, you wouldn't understand) My question is this. Should I get a tattoo to cover up the scars on my leg(where they are the worse) So my kids dont know, or leave it be. I have been debating since I was pregnant with my oldest who is 2 1/2. Cause in a wayI want to so they don't see it, and in a way I don't so that I can explain and maybe keep them from doing it. FYI: I haven't done it in 41 months.

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Asked by rebel_momma at 2:56 AM on Oct. 17, 2009 in Health

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Answers (9)
  • I have a huge scar on my arm from one I did. I had to have 13 stitches. My oldest will be 3 next month. She points to it and says that I have a boo boo and will kiss it better. I worry about how I will tell her what it is and the others are when she or my youngest daughter ask me what it is. I understand what you mean. Do you cover it and hide it or leave it and tell them..... I'm sorry I don't have an answer but I understand. :)

    Answer by MizAnn at 3:04 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • I would ask your primary care doctor perhaps. They may refer you to a dermatoligist who might be able to help more. And to think of a design or two help cover it up. Alot of creative tats out there too!

    It sounds like a good idea to want to cover it up for your kids sake of asking questions as they do.

    Stay strong and Im glad you no longer do that behavior. I am not going to bash you for your past cause it IS that. Remember that. You look like a beautiful young Mommy. When YOU want to feel better, give your baby those huggy love hugs and smile! Can't feel better then the love you get unconditionally from a child. STAY STRONG!

    Good luck and take care!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:11 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • I have a few tattoos and tat over your scars isn't gonna work very well. It will look like crap and tattoos are a work of art so ya I think you should talk with a skin doctor and see what they have to say. I know how you feel, I was addicted to needles and drugs and have have bad tracks. It's just he way the world goes around, I have been clean just about 3 years. congrats on your 41 months.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:21 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • I plan on telling my children about my past, all of it, as they are ready for it. My children are now almost 8 and almost 2. I have a few scars from self inflicted injuries that are easily visible. I have simply told my son that it was from an accident that I will explain when he gets older. He knows that there is a lot to my life that he can't understand yet, but that I will let him know about as he gets older. I don't know if this is of any help to you, but that is my perspective on it. My children need to know that I make mistakes and that I have done things that were stupid and ill planned. I feel it is important. If you do want it covered, I would consult a dermatologist first though.

    I know how hard it is to get your life under control after something like that, and the fact that you have been on a straighter path for nearly 4 years really says something to your character. Congratulations to you.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:58 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • I'm happy to hear you haven't done it in 41 months. Good for you!! I would ask your Dr. maybe they have some other treatments that could hide the scars. Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:20 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • If you get a tatoo then you're going to have to explain the tatoo aaand the scars.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:10 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • My husband and I both were self injurers. Both of his forearms and hands have huge scars, I have scars on one forearm and my upper arm. And I mean lots of scars. I think ill tell my child the truth when they are older, my husband said he would "simply tell him I was having a hard time in my life and I did some things in my past that I regret". I've also worked in a tattoo shop, and have many tattoos. If your scar is poking out at all, there's a big chance the ink won't take in the scar tissue. I had one small scar in a tattoo on my wrist and color wouldn't take in it. If its raised, start rubbing the scars with cocoa butter, it should flatten a little. Some tattoo artists won't tattoo scar tissue because its hard to do, but you can find some that will be up to it, but chances are you may be looking at a couple of tat sessions to get the ink to stay. :) good luck!

    Answer by takula at 5:34 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Thanks too all for the replies..and for not bashing, I see alot of posts where someone asks a question and people get on them and bash them.I talked to the guy who done my last tat, and he said he could definately tattoo over it, and I have seen his work involving scars. I'm just on a limb. I mean In a way I think it would be better to cover cause I don't want to explain it to them and then they think well my mom did it, so how bad can it be, but on the other hand If I do tell them about it and explain everything maybe if they think about doing it they will be able to come and talk to me about it. and the next thing I'm gonna say, please don't take the wrong way, as I tend to say thigs that come out the wrong way My uncle told me If you ever want to cut, burn, ect.. to take a big rubber band, like the thicker ones, and flip yourself with it, he says it gives you the pain you want without the after effects. but thanks again.

    Answer by rebel_momma at 6:46 AM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Think you are brave to ask the question. I have a small scar from the distant past that reminds me but is not too noticeable.

    Best of luck. Maybe you could think of an explanation that was not a lie but didn't go into details like "I hurt myself a long time ago but now it is better."

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

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