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What do you do how can you help someone like this? (long story)

First off let me give you the history. My best friend since kindergarden has a huge drug problem. In 2004 She got really bad off on meth I moved away for awhile and one day she called and told me she wanted to get clean and leave her abusive boyfriend she had a 2 year son with him. I moved back home and came to her resuce I helped her get a place and food. Well 2 days after she moved in her new home it caught on fire and the 2 year old died. She then went on the deep end bad. Then she met a guy and they started dating and she seemed to be doing better. In 2007 She had another son, he was born with meth and crack in his system they state told him away and gave him to the father, the father ended up kicking her ass and kicked her out, he had no idea she was still using and niether did I she hide it very well. Well I told her I couldnt be there for her until she straighten up her life. you have just lost 2 kids and you dont cont

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Oct. 17, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • true friends don't give up and walk away! she comes to you when she feels strong, and yes drug addiction overcomes anything, but not love, compassion, and forgiveness. you can't force her to come clean. she probably went back on a binge when she found out she was pregnant, and believes she doesn't deserve a second chance at anything. please reach out to her, ask her to get her shit together before you can never see her again, before she can't see her son grow up, before she becomes worm food. I lost a middle school friend due to driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol. tell her you want to help her heal her pains, but she has to hold up her end. get her into rehab, even if you have to book it, lie about the trip, get there and tell her you can hate me now but you will thank me one day. you love this woman for what ever reason, so do what it takes not to have to bury your friend! good luck, God bless
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 6:04 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Maybe losing your friendship will open her eyes. This is a very tragic story :(
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:50 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • even seem to care. Well she called me and told me she got married to some guy and was going into rehab, this was a month ago. I told her if she got clean I would be there for her anyway she needed, well a week after she was supposed to be in rehad I saw her posting new pics on her myspace she never went to rehab. My mom called me today and told me that my friend was preganant again and was still using bc she just got pulled over where my mom works and the cops found crack pipes and needles in the car. What do you do. How do you make someone care again. I miss my old friend and what about the new baby. What can you do?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:50 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • You can't do anything... meth users don't have a very high chance of recovering. Sorry for your loss.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:53 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Quit judging her. You can't love folks conditionally (if she gets clean) Either love her and accept her or not. It's up to you.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:12 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • An intervention would be a good thing to arrange. Call a specialist.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:46 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • About the only thing you could do would be an intervention.

    But honestly, she has to want to help herself.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:40 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • She has to want help OP. Tha is so sad but it is the truth. It takes a toll on you and your family to feel like you have to be tough on your friend. What you should do is ask a therapist how to help your friend. Call one of the hotlines for drug addictions and ask them what to do or heck even an AA hotline is better than nothing. They can point you in the right direction in helping your friend.
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 7:57 PM on Oct. 17, 2009