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I am alone with having to deal with this. DS was roughing it up with another boy and we have to meet with the principal. Why?

I feel they are blowing this out of porportion. Of course it always seem like the teacher is picking on my kid, it probably isn't so but what are they expecting me to do? We don't promote hitting or being physically abusive at home. It just happened that way at school. Nothing was said about the teacher slamming the door and yelling and foaming at the mouth? I hate dealing with this stuff. Why do the teachers always make you feel like it's your fault and talk down to you?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Oct. 17, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I always got better results with the school when I would take my 6 foot tall husband to these meetings wearing a suit and tie. If you don't have a husband grab an uncle or grandfather who"cleans up nice." You will be surpirsed at the results.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:38 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • PERHAPS SOME OF YOUR SHORT COMINGS ARE SHOWING AND YOU DON'T LIKE BEING CALLED OUT, IF THERE IS A PROBLEM AT SCHOOL WITH YOUR SON WHY NOT GO AND SEE WHAT HAPPEND HEAR BOTH SIDES THAT IS THE RESPONSIBLITIES OF THE PARENT THAT IS YOU, IT DON'T SOUND LIKE YOUR CHILD OR YOU ARE BEING PICKED ON! GROW UP MOM AND TAKE CARE OF WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:51 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Thanks for your support. We have to meet with the principal on Tuesday and this happened last Thursday, five days later the kids will be best friends by then, and that is when they will decide on what punishment to give. Recesses are lost until settlement. And like I said I don't promote violence or hitting or name calling here. My son was protecting himself after being attacked.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • nice answer anon 751.....***rolling eyes***

    Does it happen often at school? If it's a one-time thing I wouldn't worry too much about it. If it is ongoing then you need to nip it in the bud now. Talk to your son and try and find out why he is acting out. Have there been any changes in the home or at school? Reinforce that that behavior is not acceptable at home, school, or anywhere else.
    My son's school has a fantastic discipline policy...look into what they do at your son's school and if it is an ongoing issue, ask for advice from the school counselor.
    Also reward positive behavior....
    Good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:05 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • how old is he? was it an actual fight? schools are being really sticky about fights/bullying. And for the most part, I think it's warranted. If he was defending himself, then I wouldn't worry too much about it. Just encourage him to try and settle problems without violence in the future as often a possible.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:07 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • It happens too often at school, this boy teases my son and calls him names, but is sneaky and lies when he is asked about it. They miss recesses and physical education as discipline and I don't agree with that, they need fresh air and they need to burn that bottled up energy.
    anon 805 what is your son's discipline policy?
    My son is 9. Not an actual fight, pushing, holding.
    The other boy wasn't disciplined, my son was caught as the retaliater.
    The teacher is very frustrated she says he holds up the class because he doesn't catch on as fast and he writes too slow, reads too slow. Never heard anything positive from her yet.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • My son is 6...they currently use a behavior chart...the child gets a warning first...if he has to be told a second time for the same behavior, he has to color in one square and lose 5 min of recess ...third time is 2 squares and 10 min....third is 3 boxes, no recess and a trip to the principle. Parents are required to sign the chart nightly.
    There is also a strict no-tolerance policy for bulling.
    Sounds like it is just a problem with this one particular kid?
    I would see what can be done to keep these two away from each other. I know our school will separate kids that have chronic problems.
    How are his grades? Could he really be a little slow?
    His teacher doesn't sound like a winner-she should be trying to help your son rather than complain about him.
    Bottom line, write down your concerns/questions to take with you to the meeting and discuss them. Also be open to suggestions. Good luck!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Thanks, they are using the red light yellow light green light. Everyone starts the day in green light, if any trouble/concerns arise they move to yellow light-losing a recess or physical education class, then if something happens again they are in red light with a trip to the principals office. I think his grades are fine, they are passing grades. They have said they don't know what to do with him and they want him evaluated, so I'm not sure how that works but I'm about to find out. And if they seriously think there is more to it then they should be trying harder to work with him rather than against him! They said it is up to my son to stay away from this boy, they do not want to change the "dynamics" of the class.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:19 PM on Oct. 17, 2009

  • Because you are his parent so if he is behaving a certain way it DOES reflect on your teachings. Does he know you wont punish him? Does he see his father behave that way?
    You have to punish him at home or he will think it is ok. They called youin because he wont care if they punish him, he will care if you do. You are his PARENTS do you really not see why him being violent at school is your problem?
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 3:39 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • Grow a backbone, be a parent, and punish your misbehaving child. Duh!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:40 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

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