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Should I let my DD be their flower girl?

My DD's (who is 15 months) biological father has not really been in the picture. Hes visited sporatically and has bought her clothes and one thing of diapers. For a couple of months, I tried SO hard to get him to come once a week but he couldnt even make that. So HE made the call and said we should tell her when she is old enough. So we agreed. Well, now..he is getting married in May and wants her as his flower girl. I dont think it is appropriate because he is never around and doesnt take care of her. I feel like she is a prize to him rather than his daugther. Even for her 1st bday it was ALL about HIM! HIS friends came...didnt pay attention to my DD for one second. It was so awkward for everyone. She screamed cuz she didnt know him and wasnt comfortable. Anyways...what do you think? You think I'm doing the right thing by not letting her be in his wedding?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:34 PM on Oct. 18, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Let her do it. Be nice and don't make a big deal about it.

    If you haven't done so already file for custody and support. He could file for custody and support from you!

    Answer by Gailll at 10:36 PM on Oct. 18, 2009

  • Hmm if you let her do it atleast she gets a pretty dress out of it, but i understand where youre coming from. I probably wouldnt let my baby either

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Oct. 18, 2009

  • I wouldn't let her if she doesn't know him she won't feel comfortable there and will most likely not cooperate anyways. He can't just decide he wants to be a father once in a while when it's convenient for him. I hate when mothers keep there kids from seeing there dads out of vengeance for themselves but in cases like this I'd tell him he has til may to build a real father-daughter with her or she won't be in the wedding. If he doesn't make the effort you'll know what choice to make. Good luck.


    Answer by jenae_gist at 10:40 PM on Oct. 18, 2009

  • LOL sorry let out the word relationship, father-daughter relationship*

    Answer by jenae_gist at 10:41 PM on Oct. 18, 2009

  • Maybe he doesn't know crap about being a dad. I say let him see her and maybe something will click in him eventually. Good luck!

    Answer by prettyrayray at 10:43 PM on Oct. 18, 2009

  • uhm just fyi ...hes not on the birth certificate theres no way he could. and if he did..he wuldnt get anything. he has no job or anything

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:41 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

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