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PLEASE OH PLEASE HELP! ANY ADVICE PLEASE!!!

I dont know what to do!!! I grew up in a big famly of 5 kids, I had all brothers! Well I always wanted 6 kids growing up that was my life dream! LoL! Ok so it has changed a bit. I have 2 very wonderful beautiful children. But I have that feeling of wanting to be pregnant again. My dh only wanted a boy & a girl & in that order & thats the way we had them. But Im going through this stage of wanting to be pregnant again but I really dont want another baby right now & neither does dh. Dh said maybe in like 3 or 4 years we can have another. But Im just on the edge about wanting to be pregnant & I dont know why! I know that I couldnt be a suragent mother bc I get way to attached before they even pop out, lol! I just loved being pregnant nothing bothered me about it, not the morning sickness nothing, I loved ppl rubbing my belly I just loved being prego! My ? is what should I do & why am I feeling like this???? Please oh please help!

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texasmomma08

Asked by texasmomma08 at 12:44 AM on Oct. 19, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • The problem I see is you wanted six kids and married a man who only wants two. That's not something that you can reconcile easily...generally people don't change their minds.

    You've got a case of baby fever and it's not all that unusual. If it's making you crazy, then it may be something to talk with your doctor about.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:49 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • I went through that after my first even though there was (and still is) no way in hell we're having another one yet. When I get those feelings I just try to think of the reasons why I DON'T want another one. No sleep, no "me" time, diapers, formula/sore boobs, not to mention double day care costs and things like that! Yeah, no time soon for me lol.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:51 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • You're feeling this way because it's a biological drive. Not all women experience it as acutely as you are feeling it now, but it's kindly referred to as the "biological clock". Women only have so long to reproduce, and so we tend to feel like we need to be pregnant all the time.

    You can put that mothering energy into the kids you already have, and keep your options open. That's the best medicine for baby fever :)
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:52 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • I have 4 kids(9, 6, 3, girl, girl, boy 3, girl 3), and occasionally have pregnancy movements ect., i tell myself that 4 is more than i can handle and adding another would just put a strain on us all. if your at all like me; then you come from a fertile fam & get pregnant easily, therefore wanting to conceive comes naturally. dh is happy with his life; whereas you worry about being alone once both kids are in school(if they aren't yet, if they are same applies). I think about the emptiness my house will have when there's no one to take care of, but i change that thought into: i can finally take care of me for 8 hrs a day! i also think about what i want to do in the next 2-3 yrs and see how a new baby wld fit into it. we all go through a wanting pregnancy phase, but we need to take the time to figure if the timing is right, not just for mom and dad but the siblings too. but if it really bothers you enough, seek mental health!?
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 12:59 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • i got baby fever immediately after giving birth to my daughter. i was having pregnancy withdrawls. being pregnant is so special. and i loved feeling my baby move. i loved the ultrasounds, i loved the attention, and the anticipation of meeting her.
    but that baby fever is gone now because she is so much work at 7 months that once i'm through with having an infant, and she's finally a little less dependant on me, why would i want to have another infant all over again?
    if i have a baby right now, she'll be only a year and a half when the baby comes. thats a headache! just think about it that way. think of the responsibilites rather than the fantasies...thats what i have to make myself do.
    Bernie19

    Answer by Bernie19 at 1:10 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • i understand the need and the want to have another kid, if its not an option for you right now but the feeling is so overwhelming have you thought of fostering kittens or puppies at your local pet shelter? sometimes just taking in an animal to watch for a little while can help with the need for a baby....but doing it this way is more responsible because your not just out BUYING a pet to get rid of a craving...
    blueeyedgrl2377

    Answer by blueeyedgrl2377 at 5:46 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • i think it's a natural desire. helps protect the future of our species ;) i love being pregnant too and i'm pregnant now with our 2nd, and we think we only want 2 but it's so a hard to think of not being pregnant ever again!!! i thought that something i might enjoy when my children are older is try to become a birth instructor or doula. or just get more involved in advocating for more birth options (ie midwives). just something to get my pregnancy fix without having more kids.
    Stefanie83

    Answer by Stefanie83 at 10:19 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • I can relate. I have two beautiful children that I love more than anything. But for the past year now, I have desperately wanted to get pregnant again. Sometimes, I think that I'm crazy because having another baby would be another mouth to feed, which would require more money that we just don't have. Not to mention the sleepless nights and colic and formula and diapers.
    But no matter how much I think about the reasons to not have another one, I still continue to yearn for a third baby. My dh does not want to right now, for financial reasons and issues with my health, but I hold on to the chance that in time we will be able to have another one.
    In the mean time, I am focusing on my children and raising them with love. I am not letting my desire to have another baby interfere with my children now. That would be devastating to them and make them think that they weren't good enough. They are my life and I'm thankful for them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Oct. 19, 2009

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