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Staying together for the kids? What are your thoughts?

And before you get all hateful right off the bat, I don't mean that the parents are not in a loving relationship. If the children see parents cuddle and share conversations and dinner and whatnot, but the parents arent necessarily still in love, what are your thoughts? Would you stay in a relationship for the kids, after you realized you weren't in love any longer?

Answer Question
 
sweetphoenix529

Asked by sweetphoenix529 at 9:17 PM on Oct. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Level 6 (139 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Well my sons dad and I split up a few nonths ago because all we did was constantley fight & never could have a real conversation with eachother. He blamed me for him going out all the time because he was angry. I think its wrong for people to stay together just for the children because if your children see you unhappy they're going to be unhappy My sons dad & I get a long a lot better now than what we use to. We both decided to go our seprate ways..well he decided to txt it to me & couldn't be man enough to do it in person...go figure..I was living with him at the time
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • It does more harm than good, eventually even if the relationship is cordial kids will pick on the vibes. There is nothing worse than living in a loveless marriage, and kids will pick up on this regardless of whether you fight or not. You would not be doing the right thing by your kids by staying, if you are in a loveless marriage you will not be happy, and unhapiness makes you not such a great mom. Life is too short to be unhappy.
    older

    Answer by older at 9:33 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • I would say it does more harm than good, however, I recently read a very good article in Time that stated that children do far better in a two parent home. This is despite socioeconomic background, race, education, etc. Children perform better in every measure when they live in a two parent home.
    danielp

    Answer by danielp at 11:16 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • Yeah me and my 2nd husband are together but more as room mates.....my 3 girls from the first marriage think their step dad is a looser and they are right...however I cannot leave a man because he is a looser...what example does that set?
    Marriage is bound by God and unless there is abuse or adultery then you need to stay put.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:51 PM on Oct. 19, 2009

  • what is being in love?
    BUSYLOVINGHIM

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 12:05 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Actually I heard that kids are better off in a happy single parent home than in a dysfunctional two parent home. Anyways, Eventually yall are going to get tired of "acting" like you are in love in front of your children and eventually there won't be any fake happiness b/t you two. and kids can pick up on certain vibes. They are smarter than we think. I think it might be best to separate.
    DaGoodLife

    Answer by DaGoodLife at 12:14 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Children learn how to act in relationships from the models their parents' give them. My father taught me love was about gifts and money and for a long time that bled into my adult relationships. You might not realize it but children can pick up on that 'fake' or acted out love. I believe it is better to work for a possibility of another healthy relationship in the future then to stay in a loveless one.
    Ravensong

    Answer by Ravensong at 12:38 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

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