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So tell me if I am wrong?

We just moved to Cali. with four kids because my fiance was raised here! We are from Reno, and even though he hates it I have a different opinion!! (Reno) any how, I was promised that things would change, and he would start paying bills this that and the other, including, but not limited to extra help for the kids!! Well since we have been here we have been sponging, and I hate that! Also, he has been in the hospital for chronic pancreatitis. (Car accident years ago messed up his pancreas), for almost the whole time we have been here! So I have not struggled more! He does not want to tell his family when he has episodes so I am left with four kids, no money, and food stamps!!
So his brother told me today he wants his borrowed car back by nov 1st, so when I bring it up when my fiance is playing his game online with playstation2 He lashes out saying he just got out of the hospital and he wants to relax! what do you think?

Answer Question
 
alyjax03

Asked by alyjax03 at 1:05 AM on Oct. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • sounds like he has a lotof growing up to do, good luck
    mirit.rose

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:08 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I'd tell him to go ahead and relax... because in a couple of weeks he's not going to have a vehicle to go anywhere and no amount of relaxing is going to change that.
    If he'd tell them what's going on it'd be different most likely.
    I'm wishing you so much luck.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 1:14 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • let the poor man relax.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:20 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • take your kids & move back to Reno
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:44 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Tell his family.

    And if you're unhappy, move home. This isn't a fiance you have here. not in the true sense.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:53 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I think you need to go home!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:36 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Any man who "promises to change when.. " has no intention of changing at all! He will continue this behavior because you allow it. He knows that you will stay and he wont have to change. Either tell his family or leave.
    alexsmomma06

    Answer by alexsmomma06 at 9:55 AM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • i'm sorry but he's an ass. he doesn't care about anyone but himself... my father was like that and now father of my kid is becoming it too. please try to figure out what's the best for you and your kids...

    good luck to you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:39 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I understand him wanting to relax after just getting out of the hospital. Any person would, and they should have that option. However, he doesn't seem to have the track record to exactly be a stand up guy. If I were in your shoes, I wouldn't have put up with it this long. I don't know if the four kids are between the two of you or not, but I'd pack up those that are mine and hike it on out. He has a lot of growing up to do and doesn't seem to want to do any of it. You are pushing your limits on what you can do as a single person with four kids, and if he is going to continue to be a negligent person, then he has no business being in a relationship or having kids. That's how I see it. I wouldn't put up with someone who won't step up. They'd be out on their rear, regardless of their condition.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 1:56 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Tell his family and take your kids back to Reno where you were happy. I agree with the statement that a man that is always promising to change, has no intention of changing. It's the same thing as a guy saying "but honey, I'm trying" It's BS, and if he were trying then it would be happening. He will continue doing the same old crap as long as you let him get away with it and he will always promise things will change and get better and tell you is trying, but actions speak louder than words. Don't wait around on him cuz you will be waiting for a very long time.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 4:33 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

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