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16 month old terror!!!

my 16 month old dd has become a terror!! i'm assuming she's hit her "terrible two's" a little early....she screams bloody murder if she doesn't get her way..throws fits and screams if we tell her to pick up a toy (which she completely understands what we're telling her)..i'm ready to pull my hair out and go to an insane can i discipline my dd before she becomes anymore out of control? any advice would be great, i'm a first time mom and i'm still figuring things out.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:31 PM on Oct. 20, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (10)
  • My son is doing the same thing, hes 19 months. And has always been such a joy. =) now he throws himself on the floor and bangs his head on things when I say no to something. My best advice is to ignore the tantrum and continue as if they are acting normal. Thats what I have been doing and he usually gets distracted by my not responding to his fit that he acts normal again. Good Luck. =)

    Answer by LucasMama08 at 6:35 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • MY 16 MONTH OLD IS JUST LIKE THIS! WE PUT HER IN TIME OUT, AND WALK AWAY. WHEN SHE GETS OUT, PICK HER UP AND PUT HER BACK, THEN WALK AWAY AGAIN. Don't freak out, don't pull your hair out, try to stay as calm as possible, but retain your authority. I'm sorry that it is stressful to you but I totally sympathize.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:35 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • We do time outs. She gets ONE warning and then she gets time out, where she can't look at anything cool, can't play with anything and has to be bored. She sits on my lap because I don't have a place to put her where she will be safe and not associate an everyday object with punishment (like her highchair... I don't want her highchair to be the "bad" chair lol).

    In fact, I just did time out while I was typing this for pulling the cat's tail lol.

    Start with distraction and see if that works. If it doesn't, then start time outs. 1 minute for every year of age.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 6:59 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I'm with LucasMama08. Tell her once whatever you need to tell her (i.e. No, you can't have the knife) then move on. Let the tantrum run its course while you ignore it. Repeating what you said or telling her to stop is likely to make the tantrum worse by giving her attention. Trying to redirect her attention also helps. I would go play with a toy in another room where my son could partially see what I was doing. He'd get curious and give up on the tantrum. They will stop when they don't work but you have to be very, very consistent about not giving in. However, with that said, choose your battles. Make sure it's really worth the tantrum if you know that's what it will trigger. I've also found that getting my son outside to burn off energy and get a change of scenery greatly reduces the frequency of tantrums. Boredom seems to increase their frequency. Just remember, this phase will pass!!!

    Answer by momofryan07 at 7:11 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • We are having the same problem. I am just walking away and ignoring them. If I walk away then they are done in just a few minutes. I have to say that it is very stressful, but I will continue to do what I was doing before the tantrum started. We now stomp our feet when I say it is bed time and then we throw a fit and then it is all better. You just have to be patient.

    Answer by coala at 7:28 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • at this age, there is really nothing you can do but ignore the behavior, and try to distract him. Kids this age don't understand punishment yet. When he gets closer to 2 years you can start time outs, but I would just try to walk away when he acts like this and not give him the attention he is looking for. Be patient and try to make it till hes older. I know its frustrating, my 14 month old is already becoming a terror. But I just try to get him to do something different if he gets mad.

    Answer by IlovemyNicholas at 9:16 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • whoops.. I forgot you had a girl, sorry

    Answer by IlovemyNicholas at 9:16 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I have two of those kids so I feel your pain. when my two were at that age it was more a show by example thing. asking them to help while you start the clean up shows them what you expect and dont be to harsh on them cuz after all they are still learning by example. tempertantrums get them to their room. I puth them their if they want to have one and tell them when they are done they may come out. the best thing you can do is to stay calm and collected and in control. sometimes walking away when they dont get what they want makes a bigger statment to them then punishment.

    Answer by Shannie023 at 9:44 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • AT FIRST I THOUGHT THIS WAS A QUESTION FROM ME LOL!! My son is 16 mos and he is the same way. I tried time out and most of the time it works!! Just stay consistent and be sure that she is only in time out for 1 MINUTE! 2 minutes for 2 yrs etc.

    Answer by Abbey3 at 12:21 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • Some need loonger time outs than others yo could also try wats called restriant time the point of this is to calm her down what you do is:(she should be in your lap)grab her wrists cross her arms in front of her(but not too tightly)then put your legs over hers(so she cant kick you) and lean slightly forward (so she cant hit you with her head)and shewill protest trust me she'll beg scream cry but the trick is no matter how long she screams (as long as shes not throwing up) do not let her go untill she calms down I know this sounds harsh and cruel but it works I hav touse i on my duaghter the longest my child a went was 1 1/2 hours but i seems longer but the point is it works

    Answer by Redneckmomma19 at 3:40 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

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