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Does a dirty kid=a dirty or neglectful parent?

I was peeking my head into the Newcomer's Club (should be renamed the "Let's Judge Everyone Club", but let's not go there). There was a thread by a lady who said she went to her WIC appt, and saw some "dirty kids", and why do parents take their kids out of the house dirty?

My daughter is 14 months old, and she will leave the house absolutely spotless, but by the time we get to where we're going, she will have unravelled her braids, drooled on her shirt, she'll find a really cool mud puddle and get splashes of of mud on her pants...

The point I'm trying to make is: kids get dirty. It doesn't mean they left the house dirty.

Why is is not necessary to judge other moms? If I see a kid with a snotty nose, what right do I have to jump to the conclusion that the mother is a dirty person? Maybe she forgot to bring Kleenex. Maybe she hasn't noticed the dirty nose yet. Maybe she's looking for the package of Kleenex.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:32 PM on Oct. 20, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • A dirty kid is a happy kid! lol

    Answer by buzymamaof3 at 11:44 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • agreed i dont think a dirty kid = bad parents i mean you can tell if the dirt and food came from that hour or if the kid constantly stays dirty and besides if the mother doesnt look dirty and homelessthen its not a dirty child but with all the "LOOKS" aside wejust need to remember if the mother was a bad mother she wouldnt be at wic and she wouldnt have her child

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 11:38 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • Boys are the wosrt! My son will jump in every mud puddle and whipe his face on his sleeve no matter how many times I tell him not to do these things.
    There is a difference between neglect and just getting dirty. I do have an open mind though. I once saw a couple with a 2 or 3 yr old with very dirty old clothes and just had to wonder if they were homeless....wasn't assuming bad parenting off the bat...just wondering why the kid was in old soiled clothes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

  • I have a friend who is very attentive, but her kids frequently look very scruffy. Why? Because they play outside, running, exploring and having fun! It's easy to stay spotless if your kid sits in front of the TV all day. I'd rather have mine digging in the dirt.

    Answer by mancosmomma at 12:00 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • i use to think that way....until my daughter started to crawl and walk and got a little dirty.....but sometimes when i go out i see kids who are wilthy....who you can tell probably had the same clothes on for days...

    EX: we were at a festival and there was this little girl probably about 2 or 3 years old....she was walking around in feety-pjs ...dirty was 3 int he afternoon...her hair had tons of rats and tangles in it and her face was filthy......she was walking like 10 feet behind the mom and friend ( guessing it was a friend) ....So obviously i do think that= neglectful parent!

    Answer by glamomomo at 1:25 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • My grandmother, who kept a very clean house and was a very tidy woman and who raised 5 kids (4 of them boys, all of whom grew up to be reasonably clean people) had an expression -

    She said that kids were like flowers. You could keep them pretty and clean and in the house, and they would look and smell beautiful, but they would wither and die. If you wanted them to grow and thrive, they needed a little sun, a little dirt, and a little water. :-)

    Sadly, I have seen some kids who were dirty / unkempt to the point of neglect - it's a LOT different than someone's kid who got dirty on the way, or who needs to have their noses wiped, or dropped their ice cream on their shirt, or etc. I hope those judgmental people don't ever see what it REALLY looks like :-(

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 4:39 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • I agree with buzymamaof3 Dirty kids are happy kids

    Answer by fallnangel3 at 8:09 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • Every morning my kids take a shower, have spotless clothes on and off to school they go with teeth and hair brusehd. But sure enough by thetime they get home they are covered in whatever they had for lunch whatever art project they worked on that day, some of the leaves frm the soccer field are still buried in my daughters hair and their is something sticky in my sons (glue if i had to guess) but yet they have huge smiles on tehir face and always have that expression of "look what i did ma!" and im sure if i took them to walmart or whatever after i picked them up from school people would think they never took a bath. I dont think that dirty necessarily means neglectful you have to take that and several other things into account before you can make that decision.

    Answer by elananme at 9:24 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • Oh gosh, if that were true, then I'm the worst parent on the planet! By the end of the day you can tell exactly what my son had for breakfast, lunch & dinner, because it will be all over his shirt & maybe on his face. You can see that he sat in the mud & kneeled in the grass and that he spent some time helping his daddy repair the tractor out back b/c of all the grease. You'll know if he was helping me in the kitchen because there will be flour in his hair and possibly a few handprints on his pants, with a smudge of batter on his cheek thrown in for good measure.

    Yep, we may even run a few errands with him looking a mess, 'cause even if I do clean him up to make him presentable in public, it might last all of 5 seconds before he finds a mud puddle or the only spot of grease on the grocery cart....Better look quick if you want to see him clean!


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 AM on Oct. 21, 2009