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I'm having a really difficult time with this decision..

I have been away from my boyfriend for a year now. We've been together for over 2 years now. He's in college and I was planning on moving there in January and attending a college where he is at also. Well, things are not going so well financially on his side and I am getting jaw surgery and I may not be done with everything by January. But if I am...I have an option of going there. He may not be able to go to school in January bc he doesnt have enough funds this year. So I suggested, if he doesnt then maybe he could come live with me and get a job/internship in his career field. (hes a senior right now) He said he knows of a place he wuld want to work near his house right now. So that was a negative. Ive always said I'd move there, but its FAR and I'm not sure if I can handle living so far from my family. I know he has always wanted to live in TX, and I dont want to be selfish and take away from what he wants...contd

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:32 AM on Oct. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • but at the same time idk if I can handle living 1200 miles or so from my family. I wouldn't have anyone there bc his mother hates me. All his family is there. All mine are over here. I have brought up this with him before and he responded with "Isn't that going to create a lot of issues with us? Are you ever going to be able to overcome that?" And I just dont know. But I do know it will create problems. Im not sure what to do with this. Anyone gone through this? Any advice? Im at a loss.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • every relationships must have sacrifices and that needs to come from both sides just not one
    armywife2009101

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 12:34 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • I agree with that. I feel like we are at ultimatums though. Either way...we are going to be hurting. Im not sure if I should even be in this relationship because of all the obstacles we have.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:37 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • living in sin is never the right choice! GET Married and do it the old fashioned correct way and you will have peace with following God's principles...good luck, flip a coin?
    gaurdianangels

    Answer by gaurdianangels at 12:40 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • haha thats funny. you say do it the right way. then you say flip a coin. im not bashing..i giggled at that. but yeah i know...we talked about getting married but we said we needed to be around each other for 6 months at least before we get married. bc we only see each other a week or so every 4 months. :( ive thought of gettin an apartment of my own. but we thought it wuld be a waste of money bc we will be with each other when we get the chance (he is in fact very busy) so we said thats a no go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:45 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • flip a coin about location lol!
    gaurdianangels

    Answer by gaurdianangels at 12:47 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • i know hahah i got that part. he would probably say "its not that easy tho!" it isn't but at the same time...what else do we do! haha i can NOT go another year of being without him. I cant stand this. I dont think I could be in the relationship anymore. I know that sounds horrible, but i need to be able to see my bf. Talking/texting and webcam doesn't do it for me. (and NO im not talking about sex)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:53 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • i live with my SO we are not married, that is beside the point! i do know how u feel though the distance with my family is an hour in a half, away either to my siblings or my mom.. he couldn't find work over there so i followed him over here i do not have anyone his step-mom hates me witha passion, and his mom she is ok we are ok i mean everyone has their problems. If u think he is worth it then go for it but if u have doubts and wanna wait to see if and when things become more stable than u can do that too. i did it i always told my SO that the world did not want us to be together, cause of obstacles, we fought each other's families for one another and won, but then time came where we fought each other noone won then just made our bond even more unbreakable than what is was before, I am sorry if this neither makes sense or helps Good luck with either path you choose You can live in peace my simply choosing too not principle
    waterlily89

    Answer by waterlily89 at 12:53 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • I had a friend that moved from wv to fl to be with the "love of her life" but she was miserable here (fl) and kept arguing with him about going back!! well then she stopped taking her bc and ended up getting pregnant of course (it's like she was trying to trap him) and waited til her daughter turned one (i guess so he would get close to her) and took their daughter away from him and moved back to wv to be with her family because she couldn't handle not being with them anymore!! so now he's pretty much forced to move there!! That doesn't have much to do with you but it could possibly give you insight! And my mom lives in IN and so does my lil sis and niece and my DF family lives in OH..we live in FL so that's almost 1000 miles away but we are just happy together..and with our kids!! so it depends on the situation really
    WAREIZLILYBUGZ

    Answer by WAREIZLILYBUGZ at 1:30 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • Your family is more important. Trust me, you will get over him. Stay close to home. I wish I had.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:49 AM on Oct. 21, 2009

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