I would like to adopt a baby from Ethiopia. My husband and I are white and we have friends of all different ethnic backgrounds and a supportive family that is not racist in any way.
We are working with an agency now to adopt a child from Africa. I don't know if it is cold feet, but now my husband is starting to say that he is really worried about adopting a black baby for their sake. He said stigmas attached to having white parents may make him/her feel alone and unable to fit in. This was never a concern the year before we discussed adoption.
I feel angry with him and almost feel like he is being racist. He does not think the same stigmas are there for other races/ethnicities. Where did this come from?
Lastly, what are your thoughts on white parents raising a black baby? Of course we know there will be issues but we are good and loving parents with a lot to offer.
Asked by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Oct. 21, 2009 in Adoption
Answer by Anonymous at 9:51 AM on Oct. 22, 2009
Answer by lowencope at 4:07 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by MamaChamp at 4:10 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by momavanessa at 4:13 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by rkoloms at 4:15 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 4:56 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 6:10 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 6:14 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 6:40 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
I am a parent in a multicultural family thorough a transracial adoption. Your husband is being very sensitive and right on target. Any couple wanting to adopt a child from a different ethnic/culture needs to consider the things he is thinking about. What a smart man you married! I had similar thoughts because they are valid concerns and issues. Ultimately we made the decision together that while there would be bumps in the road for all of us we could do this. We do think of our child first and this is the part that upsets me about other transracial families. They are so casual and talk about being "color blind." I know of a few families that do not consider their child's race as factors in their lives.Â What we have done: moved to a very mixed community where there are almost equal white and black families along with other different "types' of families. The school he will attend has an equal percentage of black students
Answer by frogdawg at 8:50 PM on Oct. 21, 2009
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