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just making a statement i guess... :(

so me and df got into a fight because i told him he couldnt go get high with the stupid neighbor...smoking is something we use to do but with all the kids now i just cant enjoy it so i stopped and i guess i kinda hoped he would sort of too.,, but anyways he "broke up with me over it, got over it and went for a walk after nother small fight...guess where he went? the neighbors hes high as a kite right now... he left and i was really crying so he came back and asked what was wrong then said im going to go for a walk...i was still crying but he left anyways and went to go get high basically....that hurts alot when stupid small things are too important then ur fiancee crying because of u..someday im going to matter to someone.......someday....... my heart hurts :(

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:10 PM on Oct. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • i feel your pain too =( not about the weed but about the df not caring that you are upset. and feeling like you missed your knight in shining armor ='(
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:12 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • You've grown up Mama, and he hasn't. He will always be the father of your children but maybe he doesn't deserve you anymore. Think enough of yourself as your kids mom to really think about how you want to live. Maybe he has an addiction or maybe he needs to grow up. Either way it does not sound like a healthy relationship.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:13 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • ok u gotta step up to him and clear out what it is you can handle. Lay down the law. If you want him to stop, tell him to stop or you'll walk out on him, and if he doesn't, then walk out on him. He may come crawling back, but not if he knows you're going to be waiting for him. And you're doing the right thing. I wouldn't tolerate that kind of behavior for anyone...
    fefe87

    Answer by fefe87 at 6:13 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • i understand as with the first response, however, imo, emotions are decieving, later this may seem trivial, i grew up long before my DD did, don't worry he will get there eventually, give him time, if he doesn't then you can deal with it then, give the issue some space, maybe if you don't make a big deal of it he won't think it is so important anymore..just saying, good luck
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:17 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • no matter what momma u are important to your kid(s) and to us at cafemoms!!

    hugs
    joeysmommie07

    Answer by joeysmommie07 at 6:49 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • You cant expect him to stop cause you did , that is why men think you are controling them
    You need to let him do his thing and when he is ready he will quit if you nagg you will get nowhere
    and men don't care if you cry when they feeel you are controling them they think it is part of the control
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • You know I honestly think that it is a matter of habit, and he is addicted, and when you are addicted it is very hard to quit, and if he feels insecure for some reason, he may hang onto it all the more. I do understand why you feel like you do but then again if you have seen poeple addicted, it maybe he just needs more help from his dr. and he has to do it when he is ready, I'm not saying your forcing him, but if he feels forced it will make him not want to quit. Just pray for him, it is so hard because we want what is best for our loved ones but we sometimes just can't change them. My husband's dad died from smoking cancer, that type and it was so horribe to watch him die from that and have his last breathe. I applaud you for quitting! That is great!!!
    Julie800

    Answer by Julie800 at 11:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2009

  • he is being selfish and only thinking of himself. it doesnt get better...leave
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 11:21 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • Fuck him! My husband agreed to not "do anything that could get our kids taken away," which meant not smoking weed or engaging in the occasional sale of it. WHILE I WAS PREGO with #2, he started doing coke and extacy and speed and cheated on me 3 times. If having kids doesn't throw you into maturity, then nothing will and he is a selfish little boy. He is his own priority. Don't waste any more time.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:08 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

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