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Left my husband last night couldnt take it anymore!

I left my house last night after having a big discussion with my husband I got tired of him screaming at me and yelling bad words to me like bitch prostitute etc... Every time he used to get mad always screaming at me bad words but when we was not arguing he was the sweetes man I ever met My baby birthday party supposed to be this saturday coming up I bought cake decorations everything now WHAT everything is ruin Is my baby first birthday party and look now am so sad Am trying not to think about it but it hurst me that my family got destroy His calling sending me emails saying am sorry but I dont know what to do I already left the house took all my stuff what can I do should I go back or should I just leave him for ever even do I love him so much but I can't take him screaming at me the way he does when he gets mad... Please some advice my heart is so broken am so sad and is my baby birthday and I want to be very happy

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:45 AM on Oct. 22, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • i think you should just stay away. Its the hardest thing that you'll ever have to do, but in the long run it'll be better for you and your baby. I was in a similar situation 8 years ago and leaving was the hardest thing i could've done.I almost died. My daughter was 2 at the time i had to make a decision to make. live for my little girl or die for a man. Im not saying that its easy because its not. It has been good for the both ot us. If you go back it'll get worse. Good luck. email me if you really want to talk.
    Jani2594

    Answer by Jani2594 at 8:29 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • Maybe you should still have the birthday at his house . As far as staying with him....if this is the first time that you have left him i would wait a week or two let him relise how much he needs you and if you feel like it go back. Maybe that will help if it doesnt you could always do couples therapy good luck
    armywife2009101

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 10:48 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • This is one of those situations where you have to do what is right for you. We could give you all the advice in the world on here but still we really don't know your situation. Maybe you should stay with a family member or friend for a while and try to work with your problems. If it is only name calling maybe he stop, maybe now that he knows you really will leave he open his eyes up and treat you better so he doesn't loose you and your child. Talk to him about it without fighting if you can. Tell him how bad it hurts when he calls you those names, tell him how horrible it is for your child to hear the fighting and name calling. Then tell him you love him and you want to work it out, tell him you want your child to grow up in a stable loving home with 2 parents instead of only one.

    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 10:53 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • You should definitely still have the Birthday party! Why should your baby go without because you two can't get along? Not her fault. If you do decide to go back to him talk him into some anger management counseling or something!
    mamaada

    Answer by mamaada at 10:53 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • stil have the party. tell him you guys need to talk... and suggest a counselor.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • You need to get help for yourself and your husband. If he is truely sorry he will honor your wishes and start marriage counseling. It is not healthy to expose your child to this behavior. If you go back and allow this to continue you are in an emotionally abusive co-dependent relationship. The party of a 1 year old is for the family more than for the child. Your baby will not remember it. Postpone the party for a week or two. Say you are having a personal issue that needs to be taken care of and the you need to reschedual the party. the cake can be frozen. Be strange and dont allow yourself to be treated this way for one more minute.
    babyboyzz

    Answer by babyboyzz at 10:57 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • HAVE THE PARTY!!! AT YOUR HOUSE, YOU ARE THE MOM.

    Then when everyone leaves you leave with them, or at least make sure someone stays with you at all times until you leave, be sure it is someone that can handle him, if he gets out of control.

    Tell him if You love me, then you will get therapy with me. You both need it. Now that you left you can't go right back, you must stay strong. He will assume that you won't ever leave him and continue to treat you like sh..., if you go right back.

    PEOPLE TREAT YOU THE WAY YOU LET THEM TREAT YOU.

    GET THERAPY, MEET AT A NEAUTRAL PLACE SO HE CAN SEE HIS BABY, AND WORK ON YOUR MARRIAGE, IF YOU LOVE HIM STILL AND IT IS NOT TOO LATE. GOOD LUCK!!!
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:58 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • i would say that you demand anger management before yiou go back to him. you cannot live with someone who calls you those things. hopefull he will realize that he needs to change, and things will be better for you in the future. and if he refuses anger manaement, then, ovbiously he doesn't care enough about you to want to work on your relationship
    bi-polarmommy

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 11:04 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • Oh yeah, Congratulations, if you don't stick up for you. Who will???

    Good luck.
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 11:06 AM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • 1. get counselling app. for you and husband longer term rather than shorter term. If he is calling you a bitch a prostitute that is outright disrespectful. I am just now after a very very long relationship able to know my personal self worth aside from being a wife and also a mother. I've been mistreated too verbally.
    2. NO Do not go back to that house for the party. Where are you staying? Surely they will let you have the party there. If not your health and then baby's most important moreso than 1 birthday party out of many. Tell people location is changed no reason has to be given. Or hold it elsewhere another time. A birthday party can be held anytime within a month of birth to be socially correct if you need to be.

    If you can't reschedule it elsewhere just cancel it sayng you'r not feeling well, a virus can affect for a weeks to be well again.

    You are more important for you to love than for you to love him.
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 11:16 AM on Oct. 22, 2009