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DD's 13th bday party..kiddy stuff or big girl get together? HELP!!

My daughter will be 13 in a few weeks and I am not sure about her party this year. She has changed dramatically (emphasis on the drama) this year and I don't want to plan a kiddy party, but also don't want to be too serious about it all. She wants to have a barbeque on our property as my son did on his 16th birthday a few weeks ago, but she also wants to still have a pinata. I appreciate any input on this. Any ideas for how to proceed? Do we still play games? Give out prizes?... Seems this year that no matter what I do I am embarrassing and very Un Cool so I don't want to embarrass her at her birthday.
Ugh! I am lost.


Asked by Chickie12 at 4:05 PM on Oct. 22, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (9)
  • For my daughter's 13th birthday we did a "good-bye to childhood" theme. It gave us the freedom to do little kid things but sort of poke fun at it. DD picked Elmo for the character. It was warm outside so I have the kids water guns, bubbles, filled a kiddie pool, and turned on the water hose. They played on the swing set. It was cute watching all these big kids turn the slide into a water slide. The idea was sort of a last blow-out of little kid activities. I sent the water guns home instead of treat bags. It worked great and I think the guests had more fun then any party we've done.

    Answer by Bluebonnet72 at 11:25 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • At 13, my son went to a lot of boy/girl parties. Does she want boys there? I wouldn't make it too babyish. What did your 16 year old do at his party?

    Answer by mompam at 4:08 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • I wouldnt give out prizes or play games. pinata sounds fun and cooking out. Is she athletic? Wiffle ball is always fun. myabe let her burn a few cds so you have good music outside. Maybe hace a disco theme or something IDK!! such a tough age

    Answer by ria7 at 4:10 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • I would let her plan her party. That way you can't go wrong. Ask her what she would like to do at the BBQ. She is getting older but is not grown yet so you get the final say. Maybe some music. Just ask her to write down some things she thinks would be cool. I am sure she will come up with some good idea's.

    Answer by Mrs.Oriaku at 4:10 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • I'm right there w/ya Chickie! PM me - we are 2 peas in a pod! Anyway, I say it is safte to just let her take the lead. A get together like she said, bbq etc sounds fun. If she wants a pinata: great! Let her pick the games. My d wanted me to paint all the girls nails (which is a talent of mine, I can get fancy) and that was fun. Just have music and hang back and let them lead. Our babies are growing up! Have fun!

    Answer by momrocks1000 at 4:10 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • Thanks for the responses.. I think she does want to invite some boys from school and we could just have them picked up before the sleep over portion begins of course.. She has little to add after the bbq and pinata. I tell her that if she doesn't help me she can't complain how it turns out (that won't stop her) so really I am lost. MomRocks1000 it's great about the nails.. I wish I had a similar talent, but not even close. Ugh! We can't even ride the quads as her friend broke her shoulder doing that the last time she was out so we no longer allow it because the mom is deciding whether or not to sue us even though we had her verbal (means nothing) permission over the phone. They can't hike up the mountain in the desert at night like my son and his friends did because they are just not old enough.. it's not safe. (this makes her grrrr at me)..


    Answer by Chickie12 at 4:53 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • Have the barbeque and the pinata, you could do a small boys and girls mixer around this. Pick out some music together before the party that they can play. If she likes girlie things like makeovers you could do this with a few of her close girl friends after the boys are sent home. Also pick out some movies beforehand with your daughter so they can watch them later on. This is a great time to get your growing girls input on snacks, and what kind of drinks to have, and if she wants a cake or not. Good luck, most of all enjoy this new phase in your daughter's life.

    Answer by artC1s at 6:02 PM on Oct. 22, 2009

  • What about filling the pinata with items from the dollar store like mini notebooks, glitter pens, playing cards and so on.

    Answer by ny_momof3 at 3:52 PM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • Thank you to everyone for your ideas. I let my daughter read the posts so she could see what I was facing. We decided together that she will theme her party, "I'm A Big Girl Now." and we will poke fun at being a "baby" and now that she has her theme she is booming with ideas. I am really glad I posted this question because we are able to take something from everyone's ideas.


    Answer by Chickie12 at 4:35 PM on Oct. 23, 2009