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Has your child been held back in Kindergarten??

What was the reason?
Im scared that my daughter will be held back, she is not "mature" enough to be in school even tho she is 5 yrs old. She will not follow directions and will not do well in tests...I think with the requirements with todays KDG classrooms its hard not to be held back...she is being taught things I learned in 1st and 2nd grade....I dont find it fair...What are your opinions?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:25 AM on Oct. 23, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (16)
  • Is she having trouble in class, or are you afraid she will not do well based on your experiences with her at home? I really thought I was going to have that problem with my youngest when she started last year. She's pretty headstrong and had never been to daycare or preschool. It turned out she was incredibly well-behaved and fell right into place, thought. Your DD may surprise you!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:42 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • if she does home school her for a year

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:46 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • My sister is a kindergarten teacher and she has held a few children back. The way she justifies it is that it is better to spend an extra year in kindergarten and head to first grade ready than it is to continue to let a child fall further behind.

    What strategies have you tried to help her follow directions. This is a skill set that needs to be learned and practiced. Simply saying that she cannot follow directions is a near guarantee she will not be successful.

    The stakes have been raised for schools and the pressure is on to get kids ready at a younger age. Whether or not this is fair, which I surely do not think it is, is beside the point. Have a conference with the teacher and find out what your daughters strengths and weaknesses are. Establish a routine at home to work on these skills.

    The good thing is that it is only October, so you have plenty of time to get your daughter caught up.

    Answer by mommyjenny2009 at 2:50 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • how often do you work with your kid?/

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:57 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • OP here- she is just having problems all around. She is VERY smart, but she will not demonstrate it to the teacher or the even kids...Im not sure what it is with her, but I just dont think that she is mature enough to continue...I mean I will keep her there in school but I dont know why she will not listen or follow directions at school...we started her with a therapist and we are hoping that will help her out of her rut but the pediatrician has diagnosed her with Selective Mutism, she totally shuts down at school...she has been doing alittle but better but I feel she still has a ways to go..

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:59 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • op here- I work with her daily for about 1.5 hrs a day.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:59 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • Op here- she has the basic knowledge that is needed to be in KDG but she is not participating in anything....she knows her alphabet, her numbers to 100 and she is starting to pick up on phonics and she knows her colors and shapes...

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:01 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • With selective mutism and other behavioral difficulties, your daughter may qualify for some special education services. The process to get her in is pretty hefty for everyone involved, especially her teachers. However, if your daughter qualifies for special education services she would be able to get some additional individual help. I know the "special education" label could be scary, but the additional help could do her a world of good.

    Answer by mommyjenny2009 at 3:07 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • Since you have a diagnosed problem I would advise you to get the school involved to get her the extra resources she needs. I know it made a world of difference for my son and yes it can be a process but it is worth it in the end. Looking back I never would have thought we would be where we are now my son has Aspergers and he would shut down often at school now after having the services he needed during elem. school he has moved on to the middle school and is in all advanced classes maintaining A's and B's. The intervention early on makes all the difference in the world.


    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 3:26 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

  • I was held back and turned out fine (I didn't play well with others and seemed stuck in parallel play instead of moving on to the next developmental stage). It may not seem fair but being held back can actually help because she will get ahead socially and mentally.

    I was also diagnosed as having dyslexia and ADHD. A disability can make a child slow in her own age group but on par with the kids a year younger than her so having her held back may mean that she won't be the "dumb" one in the class and instead make her normal or even the smart one.

    Answer by MamaMay007 at 6:11 AM on Oct. 23, 2009

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