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How pissed would you be?

DH has his own small business and took them out to celebrate this afternoon. He told me they were going out for appetizers from 3-5 so that he could be home and we could do dinner together ( our Fri night ritual). So Im expecting him home at 5:30, 5:45 the latest. After 6 rolls around, I call him to see if he's on his way and he doesn't answer, then I wait 10 more mins and call back, still no answer. AFter the 3rd call he finally answers and says they are packing up - by now it's like 6:30. So good thing that I didn't depend on him and I went ahead and had a pizza delivered because the kids were starving, but he never knew that.

I am like LIVID because he did not have the consideration to call me and say he was ru nning late and to go ahead and make dinner plans without him, and also that he didn't answer my phone calls. He claims it was noisy but that is why phones come with a vibrate feature IMO.

Am I blowing it up?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:58 AM on Oct. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I just do not get angry about stuff like that. It is really easy to lose track of time when you are talking and having fun with coworkers and friends. I have done it and so as my husband. We do not own each other or control each other. You know where he was and who he was with. Having dinner delivered without him is just not that big of a deal. I am a firm believer in picking your battles.


    Answer by FL2AK at 1:02 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • OP here - But what about him not answering the phone? That doesn't bother you either?

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:05 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • it is ok to be irritated, and he probably had it on silent or something. these things happen. if he is usually good about things, oh well. it isn't like he came home at 8 or 9... let it go, and have a little later dinner, your kids are fed and you can have time to yourselves once the kids are inbed... even if you have to tuck them in a little early. ask him to make sure his phone is on vibrate next time, and let it go. i know how irritating it is, my hubby used to do this a lot... but thats why it was bad, it was A LOT... but one or twice? meh.

    Answer by missbreezy214 at 1:08 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I think you might be overreacting, just a little. The not answering the phone thing, yeah, that's obnoxious, but it's not like he was intentionally ignoring you. My husband has had his phone set to vibrate and still not known that I was calling because of where it was in his pocket; he doesn't usually ignore me, so while I might be mildly annoyed, it's not going to piss me off.

    As to the not calling and letting you know he was running late, again, annoying and inconsiderate, but unless you specify that this is something that is going to set you off and he does it anyway, he's probably thinking how glad he is that he has a wife who "understands"and won't flip her lid if he's a little late. Until you tell him otherwise, he's not going to know, even if it just seems like common sense to you and me.

    Answer by Guinhyvar at 1:12 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • if this is the only thing your husband does that is bothering you and it doesnt happen often..then count your lucky stars. i would love to have a nightly ritual with my dh about having dinner. and you got to order a pizza??lucky you i have no money and if i did have some money and i ordered a pizza with it he'd be livid. your dh sounds like a gentleman. try not getting an answer everytime you call.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:15 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • Since you knew he was going out and went ahead with dinner, I don't think you need to be very upset unless maybe you're worried about what he was doing?

    Answer by TXdanielly at 1:22 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • OP here - TXdanielly - no, pretty confident that he was where he said he'd be.

    Just think it's really rude that I could've held out on feeding the kids due to waiting on him and he couldn't call or answer the phone.

    But Im working on calming down, maybe by morning.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:47 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I think you blew it way out of porportion. He went out with his friends. Something that probably doesn't happen very often. And he missed one Friday night. Big deal. I'm sure it was noisy in the resturant. I think that your being very immature about it.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 1:51 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • i get where you are coming from! when my boyfreind does not call me to tell me hes going to be late coming home im upset cuz in my mind maybe something happend to him.. couple months back couple days before my birthday his lungs partially colasped and now im worried it will happen again and when he does not let me knows hes going to be late i freak out wondering if hes ok so i totally get where you are coming from!

    Answer by elias1mamma22 at 2:20 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I do not think anything of my husband not answering his phone either. I do not always answer mine for one reason or another. If my husband is in the middle of a conversation I do not expect him to stop and answer his phone. That is rude.

    Answer by FL2AK at 2:44 AM on Oct. 24, 2009

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