Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What can I do to avoid cheating on my husband?

He makes me feel horrible. He always makes excuses for his kids and ex wife. His kids are rude and his son has made racist remarks to me in the past. He is suppose to alert me when his son comes over however this has not been happening. I understand he has an obligation to his kids but since I have married hi his son seems hell bent to make it difficult. When when dated he was no problem. I want out because of his lack of support. I want to be treated like a human being but just a roomate. What should I do? I have had numerous discussions but he does not listen. I don't want m kids to go through a divorce again. I could stay and endure this but then I would be unhappy. I really don't want to cheat but I crave closeness.

 
oliviahank

Asked by oliviahank at 8:52 PM on Oct. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Level 8 (261 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • I'm so sorry this is happening to you, but cheating won't help your situation it may only give him justification later for what he's done wrong in place of taking what he's done wrong as his own responsibility. I would either seek marital counseling if you truly want to try to make it work, or separate and seek a divorce, but there is no need to continue to suffer.

    It sounds like his son could use some counseling too, maybe the adjustment of your marrying his father is something he's not willing or can't mentally handle, either way I agree his father, your spouse, needs to take steps to fix the situation. Again, I'm sorry this is happening to you, but I hope you don't cheat it will only cause a divorce that you've held off in the end.
    Knightquester

    Answer by Knightquester at 9:58 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I would suggest that you tell him that it's time for counseling. If he refuses counseling tell him that you either BOTH go to counseling and honestly try to work things out ...or it's time for you to leave.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 8:55 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • If you are not happy---leave. And leave before you cheat.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 8:55 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • If you are not happy. Leave him.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:56 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I honestly hate it when girls give answers like that. If you are not happy then leave right. It's the EASY thing to do.

    Counseling first. Happy marriage = a lot of hard work
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 9:02 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • Leave cheating is for losers !
    CSRodriguez

    Answer by CSRodriguez at 9:04 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • Thank you outstandinglove!

    As soon as marriage isn't all candy and roses, girls immediately say leave!! If he's hitting you, LEAVE, if he's cheating on you, LEAVE, if you are just having a rough patch, seek counseling from a pastor or professional counsoler. Good luck.
    toriandgrace

    Answer by toriandgrace at 9:04 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • I will seek counseling....And this rough patch has been going on for over 3 years....AND I HAVE BEEN FAITHFUL THROUGH IT ALL.I am very tired and am seeking advice. Thanks ladies.
    oliviahank

    Answer by oliviahank at 9:07 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • Thank you outstandinglove!

    As soon as marriage isn't all candy and roses, girls immediately say leave!! If he's hitting you, LEAVE, if he's cheating on you, LEAVE, if you are just having a rough patch, seek counseling from a pastor or professional counsoler. Good luck.
    ___
    Exactly! Why leave because it's a little bit hard? That's marriage. Sometimes things are difficult. You work through them and that's what makes your marriage stronger.

    3 years and you're just now seeking advice? I would have been in the chair of a counselors office 6 months in with or without my spouse.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 9:12 PM on Oct. 24, 2009

  • no dont cheat you would be committing adultery! Get some romance time earlier to bed??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:34 PM on Oct. 24, 2009