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Hi, I am 20 yrs old and a mother of 3. My oldest Dallas is 3 and has a few problems he is in speech therapy and is being tested for Autism soon. I have a almost 2yr old and a almost 1yr old. They are both girls.

The one I am having the hardest time with is Dallas. I am just so overwhelmed. I LOVE my children. Don't think I don't I am doing the best I can but it is just a lot to handle. I was planning to start school in Jan but now I am afraid I wont be able to do it. I am afraid that with all of Dallas' drs apt I wont have time.

Please if there are any of you that are willing to talk to me. Please do judge me. I am just looking for some help.

Answer Question
 
edgpag

Asked by edgpag at 8:37 PM on Oct. 27, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • i wouldnt rush the schooling just focus on him for now one thing at a time mommy,dont overwhelm yourself by putting everything on your plate.
    BUSYLOVINGHIM

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 8:39 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • i agree that it will be hard, and you may have a crappy couple of years, but I thinkyou should go ahead with school if at all possible, however, you are the only one who can make this decision, FOR YOU, do what you feel is right. know one knows you better than you so do what you know you can handle
    Hulkgrrl

    Answer by Hulkgrrl at 8:40 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • I went to night classes my first two years so that I could be with my DD in the morning and my DH had her after work. Do you have someone to help in your children's care? If so you should be able to work something out though it may be hard because going to class is not the only time you need, studying can consume many hours. Look into online classes I took about 1 or 2 of these each semester too, they are harder though IMO. So maybe start with one at first.
    PsychMommie

    Answer by PsychMommie at 8:41 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • Do you have someone who can help you with him? Maybe a parent? I know how hard of time you will have you need to think what is best for you and your child. You have to realize that Dallas will never leave your house he will always need someone there with him, even if he gets into a support indepent living group he will need you. You need to make sure you are ready for all that and if you are not then do whats right for him and give him to someone who can provide and meet his needs, I am not bashing you whatsoever. But my mom had my youngest sister she is 16 and with autism, and it was hard on all the family hard on my mom. And my mom told me if she never meet Jill and know the girl she is today she would have gave her up for aoption, but she wont now bc she knows her and made those sacafices, your young. Think about what would benefit dallas the most.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:44 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • Thanks :) to all of you

    I am going for all online classes. I am the only one who takes care of my kids all day I dont have anyone to help. My SO is home at night but not much help :(
    edgpag

    Answer by edgpag at 8:44 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • OMG!! You are making me feel like a total slacker. I have a 3 year old and dropped out after 2 weeks of school. I work full time too, and I just couldn't handle it all. You have 3 kids all in or around "terrible" ages. Since DD was 1.5 I've been having discipline issues with her. I think it's normal, I'd wait till their in school to go back, you'll have more time and they'll be more independent.

    camiam81

    Answer by camiam81 at 8:45 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • The only Parent I have around is My mom but she has epilepsy (SP?) and she has 2 young children to take care of.. I cant ask her she tries to help but I wont put that on her. I know it is going to be hard I am just in a rough patch. I know I can do it. I just need some time to figure things out in my head and nobody wants to let me. My MIL is telling me I have failed him as a mother and that it is my fault he is like this.
    edgpag

    Answer by edgpag at 8:49 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • I take classes through the university of Phoenix ( www.phoenix.edu ) which is relatively low-cost when you consider what other schools cost, fully accredited and totally online (with institutions in other states for tutoring, physical classes, etc.) If you're concerned about scheduling, why not start there? If it's between going to a local school and not going to school at all, this may be a third option that is really feasible. Good luck sweetie, stay strong!
    sweetphoenix529

    Answer by sweetphoenix529 at 9:11 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • Your MIL is telling you that you have failed him, and he may be autistic? Austisim is not because you failed him. You have 3 young children, are going to sign up for online coarses and I salute you, high five momma! No you do not give your child away like a previous post implied. If your son is autistic opinions are like-- well you know. Get on groups on cafe mom with experienced moms with children with autism. They may have different opinions, but they have experience to back it up and will be supportive of you. In fact I would join a group and tell them about Dallas, and they can help you now with the testing. They can help you with the school. Find out, Dallas is autistic I think he is eligible for a bus to come to your house, and take him to school now. This is for children over 3. An evaluation at school, if he is determined delayed he is eligible under certain criteria. Hooray for school, listen to MIL fail YOURSELF!
    SEEKEROFSHELLS

    Answer by SEEKEROFSHELLS at 9:14 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

  • i would start school but start slow, and tel SO he needs to help more or pay more bills so you can work less to better yourself. It will be the hardest thing you will ever do and I only have one child, Good luck and if you need any support you can message me.
    Cherish050307

    Answer by Cherish050307 at 9:22 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

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