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I'm so angry!

I have a 21 month old and a 4 month old daughter and my sister is telling me that I am a horrible mother and that it's so sad and pathetic that I am a stay at home mom. She said that I am a horrible mother because my 21 month old isn't potty trained yet (even though she is now, she just didn't know it at the time) and she climbs around like a monkey. She said that I would be up a creek without a paddle (she didn't say it that nicely) if my husband ever left me because I haven't finished my education, etc.

She makes me so angry. She constantly lies and is a very bad role model (even though she is a teacher and the reason I never want my children to go to public school) I told her that I didn't want her in me or my children's lives anymore. Is this bad? Should I remove her from my children's lives? Would it be sending the wrong message to my kids to erase her from our lives completely?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:49 AM on Oct. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • ok first of all No youarent wrong for being completely agnry at her. NO ONE has the right to call you a bad mother. And my son who will be 3 in Jan uary isnt potty trained yet, just because he isnt ready. It has nothing do to with the parenting skills. If you wnt to cut her out of both you and your kids lives you have to ask your self some questions. Is she rude towards your kids? Does she act like this infront of you kids? Is she good with them? Does she talk bad about you or to you infront of your kids? If so then by all means you do whatever you have to do for your kids. If she doesnt do any of these things and its just towards you and infront of you then I would think twice about removing someone from their lives. BUT youdo whatever you feel like you need ot do! (cont.)

    Answer by Amanda7891 at 1:57 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • I am also a stay at home mom, I didnt finish college either. I wanted to stay at home with my kids and raise them instead of a stranger doing it. I think of it as we are the LUCKY ones who have someoen who can support and provide for us so we can be there for our kids. She sounds jealous to me, so dont take it to heart! I would just laugh it off as jealousy!

    Answer by Amanda7891 at 1:59 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • I'd cross her off the social calendar. SHE is setting the bad example.

    Answer by gdiamante at 2:07 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Wow. You should tell your sister you are an adult and if she can't respect your decisions regarding your life, she is welcome to visit only on holidays.
    Sorry....TOXIC family member alert.

    Answer by SusieD250 at 2:20 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • why is it that if a sahm does not finish college she is an idiot who would be screwed if her husbands left her. But as soon as you get the degree its well you just wasted a bunch of money. Why did you get a degree you are never going to use? Blah, Blah,blah. I have family members and strangers ask if I'm working yet? My baby girl is two months old. My husband is happy, I'm happy. Our two children are happy. I have found things are a lot less stressful we do not argue nearly as much as we used to, arguing over who is supposed to clean what.
    I say tell her to mind her own dang business, stop talking to her for awhile. she will figure it out. The only thing that matters is if you and your family is happy.

    Answer by lady-J-Rock at 10:17 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Why don't you just ignore her. You are not obligated to listen to your sister. If you are happy with your decision that no one else's opinion matters. I think the only reason you are upset is because in some small way you must agree with her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:22 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • You don't need this horrid person in your life.

    My daughter was reading and tying her shoes before she was out of diapers...

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:29 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Life is short and as far as we know, we only get one. Why on earth would you allow toxic people in your life and the lives of your children. I would say, you make me feel bad about myself and I refuse to let you do it one second longer...good day!

    Answer by salexander at 10:36 AM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • It sounds like your sis has issues. I'd cut her out.

    21 months is young to potty train. Good job!

    Answer by Pnukey at 12:42 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Hmm, is sister maybe jealous??? She could be lashing out at you because she sees you leading the life she wants. Not the best, or most productive way to deal with her feelings, but unfortunately it happens more than you can imagine!

    Now, I am very jealous of you! When I was in the 3rd grade I knew that I wanted to be a SAHM when I grew up. I am currently sitting here at work while some one else watches and raises my children for me. Not at all what I wanted! Hopefully the hubby will get a better job someday and I will be able to quit mine. However, right now I am the one that carries the insurance, so here I am day in and day out!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

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