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How long should it take for him to get over it?? Constantly bringing up the past and starting fights...

My SO and I have been together about 4 years. He has a temper and for a period of about 6 months in our relationship he was abusive, physically and emotionally. We broke up this last march because of his behavior and I started to talk to someone else. As soon as we broke up, the SO did a complete transformation, started meds and therapy, and all has been well for the last 7 months. The brief friendship that I had started with this other person was over just about as soon as it started. So, all has been good with the SO and I...but he keeps bringing up the past and expressing how angry and upset he is...and he says things like "make me feel better about it"...well im sick of making him feel "better"...he treated me like shit and I had enough of it and made the decision to move on...why doesn't he get this and shut the hell up about what happened in the past???


Asked by Anonymous at 5:50 PM on Oct. 28, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • yea it doesnt sound like hes changed..hes changed the way hes abusing you but he is still abusing you. if he really wants you two to work out he needs to drop the past and move forward. maybe its best if you do leave. you shouldnt need to make him feel better about how you began to move on with your life! i think you deserve better. and i hope everything turns out well.

    Answer by naturepeace at 6:04 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Because you came back. I hate to break it to ya, but abusers don't just stop. Its not that simple. Also, by him dredging up the past and insisting YOU make HIM feel better, sounds like he's still being abusive. If you don't like it get out.

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 6:00 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Is he still in therapy? Because he needs to be. The job's not finished yet.

    Answer by gdiamante at 6:54 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • I had enough of it and made the decision to move on.

    Looks like you made your mine up already. Get on with life. He can only make himself happy.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Oct. 28, 2009