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My daughter bit another child doing preschool and I was totally taken back...

I was informed by my husband that on Monday my 3 1/2 year daughter bit another childs arm. We went threw the biting stage with her durring the "terrible two" stage and haven't had an issue since. So, when I dropped her off at school together I discussed the issue with the teacher, being I was totally embrassed and felt terrible. I was trying to find out what child it was so I could personally say sorry and let to be know that I had a long talk with my daughter. As this converstation was taking place the child and his dad showed up. The father crude comments and stroming out of the building before I could say anthing really took me back. I totally understand he was upset, but he was so rude and made some unnesscary comments. Now, there is some real tension and it's only October. How am I to combat this sitution?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:06 PM on Oct. 28, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (6)
  • write a letter and say sir im so sorry and i understand you are upset i have taken care of this and once again want to say sorry for what took place.what did the dad say?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • If that dad was actually knowlegable of how children that age behave, he might not have acted so rudely. I used to be a preschool teacher and trust me when I say that it is much more common than you think it is. You did the right thing and you need to write this guy off. Write the parents a note saying your sorry if you really feel like they need to know that you're sorry. I remember when a girl in my son's class bit him and the mom felt really bad about it and was really apologetic to me. I told her it was normal and that I was hardly worried about it besides...I don't know if my son provoked it or not. It happens sometimes and you handled it appropriately.

    Answer by lowencope at 8:10 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • The dad was understandably upset. I guess I'd be a bit peeved if some kid bit MY daughter. I'm sure he cooled off and realized he was being a bit much in his response to you. You did all you could do. Maybe you could have your daughter color a nice picture for the child she bit.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:58 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Oh don't worry about him. You weren't there to stop it! Who's to say the other child didn't provoke yours? (Yes they can provoke one another at that age!) It would be different if you were in the room and watched it happen. Hell, if he's going to be mad at anyone, it should be the teacher- not you! (I am not saying the teachers at fault, just that she was there when it happened) My son has been the biter, and the bitee and I'm never mad. Kids will be kids.

    Answer by Annabel1809Lee at 11:03 PM on Oct. 28, 2009

  • Just let it go. He will get over it. I am a preschool teacher and parent and have been on both sides of biting. My son only bit one kid and that was after this kid bit everyone else. The kid did stop after my son bit him. I felt bad but the parents were fine with it and understood that biting happens. As a teacher, at 3 1/2 biting is unacceptable. A 3 1/2 yr old should have the vocab to say what they are feeling. My preschool's policy is, after the 3rd time biting, the child can not come back to the preschool. ( We have 3 and 4 year olds).

    You need to find out why she bit the child? What was the situation? Give her other means of communicating what she wants, needs or feels.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 12:01 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • These things happen and at three kids are still learning to express themselves, she has been spoke to about it. I would ask the teacher what caused the bite and that way you can teach you child what is the right response in a situation like that. More in likely she was faced with a situation that she did not know how exactly to respond to that upset her or maybe even frightened her. The best thing to do is to teach her a better way to express herself next time.

    Answer by PsychMommie at 10:47 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

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