Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How would you handle a potty trained 4yo who wets his pants?

My son has been potty trained since he was 2-1/2, but he will still wet his pants! He's 4-1/2! It's not every day, but it is a few times a week. I have a star chart with rewards for clean and dry pants. I also ask him to try to go about every hour or so. I think he's just lazy. Right how when he wets I make him stand in the corner for 10 minutes in his wet pants so they get a little uncomfortable, then make him help change, put the wet clothes in the laudry, etc. He keeps having accidents. Any other ideas? Would you spank for this? I'm at my wits end! Please help!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:35 AM on Oct. 29, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • Do you remind him to go to the toilet. Or do you just let mind remember to go himself. Kids have a tendency to hold it tell they have to go really bad then they can not get to the toilet in time. Go back to making him go to the bathroom.

    Answer by louise2 at 7:46 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • I agree with louis2. My 4 1/2 yo waits until he's literally jumping up and down to go to the bathroom, so of course when he doesn't make it on time, he wets his pants. He doesn't get in trouble because we remind him that it was an accident, but we teach him that it's not okay to wait until the last minute to use the bathroom. He's also good for not going before we leave the house, then as soon as I go to the store, he's like mom I gotta go pee! Ugh

    Answer by tabc531 at 8:57 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • My 4 year old has only had accidents when she's been stressed or upset about something.

    But I agree, if you don't remind him to go to the bathroom, he may have a hard time remembering himself.

    I wouldn't punish him (spanking or time out) because it IS an accident. And I think the punishment may lead to more accidents.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • First, i would see the doctor to rule out any underlying medical issue. Second, the star charts are a joke really, as i'm sure you've realized, it doesn't inspire much! I would definatley not spank, as that could lead to more problems.

    I babysit a boy full time, he's 4. He was lazy. I would have him "try" often and use reminders too. It was easier for him to wet his pants and say "change me", then to go use the bathroom, especially when we were outside. He didn't want to quit playing to use the potty. He also would wet when he was mad and/or having a tantrum. Finally, i said no cartoons the rest of the day if you have an accident. AND, i told him no more library trips or fun trips until he was done having accidents. After a few weeks of following through with what i said, he realized going to the bathroom meant getting fun things. Probelm solved.

    Good luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • sometimes at that age when they are doing something that they like doing like watching their fav cartoon or playing they are afraid they are gonna miss out on something so they wait too long and it just happens. I would'nt punish your child for this. I would just remind them especially if they have had lots to drink and they are doing something exciting to go take a potty break even if they say they dont have to.

    Answer by shay1130 at 11:26 AM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • potty treats. if the stickers aren't working anymore, try a different sort of treat... but like the others said, don't punish him, because that will lead to more accidents.

    Answer by katatrinakay at 12:17 PM on Oct. 29, 2009

  • hello hun please email me at and we can chat I have a ton of good idea's for u please I want to help lets chat

    Answer by momofmany778 at 7:12 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in General Parenting
kids and beauty pageants?

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
One and half late?