Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

custody issue help please

I have this friend who has a little boy. She and the dad are no longer together, and the dad is a real jerk. He is always taking the little boy and not bringing him back to her (she doesnt have a car) but he will take him for like a week and bring him back for a day or two and take him again for anothe week. no matter what. She doesnt have money for an attorney to fight for custody or a parenting plan and she is too "scared" that his grandparents willl win custody of him. Is there any services you know of that would help her for "free" or so to help get a parenting plan what kind of advice can you give me to help her?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:11 PM on Oct. 30, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • She can get a free consultation from a lawyer. ...well, most lawyers offer that anyways.

    And depending on where she lives she may be able to get some free legal aid services. She needs to call around and try to find someone who might be able to help her.

    She also needs to be keeping a record of everything. EVERYTHING. When he's picked up, when he's dropped off. What kind of condition he returns in. What his behavior is like after a visit from dad. EVERYTHING.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 7:15 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • Make sure she knows they have to agree on a date for him to bring their son back. If not, he doesn't look like he is doing anything wrong and yes document everything!

    Answer by katie23 at 7:22 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • He has the right to take the son. There's no custody order in place, so the mom and dad have equal rights under the law.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:31 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • but he is taking him for 5 or 6 days and only bringing him back for like 1............. and then he comes and takes him again

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:34 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • She can call legal aid, but also she can go to family court and file for custody with out a lawyer. Until my son was 12 and adamant that he did not want to be forced to go to his fathers EOW I never got a lawyer and sometimes my ex did bring a lawyer and I still got what I/my son wanted. Until there is a custody order both parents legally have equal custody meaning either one of them can do what ever they want, her ex could pick up her son one day and decide to NOT return him if he wants to. As long as she is not using drugs, abusing alcohol, neglecting or abusing the child she will probably not lose custody, however if dad takes him and decides not to bring him back and she lets that go for too long with out filing for custody that will look bad and the judge may decide to keep the child with the father becuase that is where he is used to living.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 7:40 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • My town has this office called SHARP will help you fill out and file the paperwork for free. Maybe your town has something similar?

    Answer by justluvinmyson at 7:48 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • where i live if you file for child support you can get legal help in also the custody end of things. has she tried that office?

    Answer by sati769leigh at 8:59 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • She can go in and file for custody and if she doesn't have money she can get a legal aid lawyer. HOWEVER, its seems as if dad is rasing the child more than she is and even if she doesn't have a car doesn't she have friends, feet, and/or public transportation.
    Sorry but when you want something you gotta go get it.
    her only hope is to file first and fast.. If there is no custody order BOTH parents have the same rights. Why is she letting him take the baby back if she want to keep her son? She can simply say NO

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 9:22 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.