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Am I doing something wrong? Why does he do this? Please help!

My SO and I used to have a VERY active sex life. We've been together a little over a year and a half. Now obviously our sex life has kind of calmed down a bit. We have sex a few times a week. But we still have fun. We bring toys into it, always trying different positions...all sorts of different things...but he beats off like at LEAST once a day. WHILE I'M HOME! What am I supposed to make of that? He'll do it first thing in the morning, after we had sex the night before...he does it when I get up and bring the kids upstairs. We are young, I'm 20 and he's 21. I just don't get it. It makes me feel like I'm not enough for him, or he'd rather use his hand, then I getting all worked up for nothing? Does anybody else's SO do this? What do you guys think? Let me know..

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Oct. 30, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • idk,. my dh doesnt beat off. he says im enough for him...maybe he wants to have sex he just doesnt want to "inconvience" you?

    Answer by naturepeace at 8:45 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • Its probably just a viarity thing. It sounds like the man has a huge appetite. Honestlly, I'd probably be relieved that he was OK taking care of himself so often. Talk to him about it. Ask him why. Don't be mean about it- just curious.

    Answer by IrishMommaC at 9:03 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • I dont think it is as bad as you are thinking, I think sometimes he just wants to get "off" and not have to worry about all the extra stuff..

    Answer by midnightmoma at 9:21 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • its normal. dont worry about it so much.

    Answer by Deathlilly at 9:22 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • Wake him up with sex tomorrow and see what happens.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:23 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • Here is my take on it, if I am getting enough, then its fine and I don't care. If he would rather take care of it himself and I am needy, then its a problem. DH and I have found a happy medium of 3-5 times per week then take care of the rest by ourselves. Sometimes thats enough for both of us but rather than "make" the other person do it, we just take care of it. I wouldn't worry about it if your satisfied.

    Answer by auroura at 9:24 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • Men in their 20's are at their sexual peak. They are more horny than ever, though I don't see them ever NOT being horny. Anyway, my hubby is the same way. It doesn't bother me though. I'd rather him beat his meat at home, than to have someone else beating it for him. (cheating)

    Answer by NightPhoenix at 9:35 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • id be pretty pissed if i was you.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 10:41 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • My SO whacks off all the time. He enjoys it. It doesn't mean I'm not enough for him. He just gets excited and does his thing. He might even be jerking off and thinking of you so it's all good

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:45 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

  • call me insecure but that would bother me and for sure make me feel like im not enough. my fiance beat off in the shower a few days ago without even attempting to hav sex first and he knows that he doesnt give it up enough. i was PISSED. the way i see it, if hes jacking off hes not 100% satisfied. my fiance says he is and says he was thinking about me but why would you think about doing someone when they are right there for the taking??? talk to him about it. let him know it bothers you and tell him your down to do it when he gets the urge.

    Answer by maranda1389 at 11:43 PM on Oct. 30, 2009

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