Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is it just me or is it harder to make friends as you age?

I have never had any trouble making friends before, but since moving to Rapid City, SD. It has be very hard. I thought having children would make it easier, but it has not. I have a 5 year old and 2 year old. Any suggestions? We have been here a year and I am going crazy. Thanks!

By the way - I am a happily married mom (7 years) and I am over 35 yrs old. Established in a MOPS group and a good Church.

Answer Question

Asked by myboysnme07 at 12:42 AM on Nov. 1, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I have no good advice to give you. I am in the same situation except that we moved 7 years ago and I have not made any close friends. The only other moms that I talk to are the moms of my children's friends. I am a SAHM and have yet to meet anyone here.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:50 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • idk. i'm 22 and i don't really have a lot (or any) real friends. ...i don't think it's age that makes it difficult.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:03 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • It's impossible. I always tell my daughter that it's harder to make friends as an adult than as a child. I go out of my way to be nice to people i.e. small talk, compliment their kids, etc. I always end up with the cold shoulder or disinterest. I have given up on making friends. I used to think I was doing something wrong, but I Think the people around here are just a bunch of uptight snobs now.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • It's difficult because of me, I think. I meet women at church and around town, and can talk to them and enjoy their company, but am not very good at following up- offering to get together, or even wanting to. I am such a loner now. It's not healthy though..

    Answer by TXdanielly at 1:49 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • I think with age, it definitely gets harder . . . even to keep up with old friends. I definitely need to make friends, but as a SAHM it's really difficult. I know how you feel.

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 1:21 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • I am 49 years old and I still make friends very easily. When you meet someone you think you might be interested in becoming friends with invite them to coffee or out to lunch with you.
    Recently, I developed a friendship with someone who invited me to her zumba class. My next door neighbor had a candle party the other day and I met some of her friends.
    Friendship is about finding common interests and reaching out to become a friend.
    I met one of my dearest friends at a BBQ. She and her husband showed up and when she saw me she immediately came over and sat on my lap. She then proceeded to tell me we were going to be very good friends. I was apprehensive at first but she was right. I laugh with her all the time and love her to pieces. Her husband calls us a couple of cackling hens. I was 41 and she was 43 when we met.
    Reach out to other people and find shared interests.

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 7:21 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • I think living in the military community makes it easy to make friends. I had some very good friends at our past duty stations. And when we moved here (middle of civilianland in WV), I gave my phone number to the girl we were talking to in line at walmart. The first week we got here. She and I have hung out a few times and we talk several times a week. :)


    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 7:25 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • Yes, I think it does.

    Answer by presleyfan1 at 7:53 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • I could be the area. Some places are old, established communties that just don't trust outsiders. It can be hard to become accepted as a member of the community. Start volunteering and do as much as they will allow. If you go to church, get involved. You have to make them trust you as someone who shares their values. You have to become one of them. They are not going to change to be like you. Be kind, be welcoming and see if it turns around.

    Answer by jesse123456 at 8:36 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

  • You may not like my answer, but I walk alone. I have two sisters i chat with or have lunch with, but that is it. ME MYSELF AND I. Sometimes friends can backstab you, and let's not talk about two-faced. Do you have sisters or female cousins you can chat with or hang out with? My friend it is hard to find a good trustworthy friend these days. I hate when someone smile in your face and when you turn your back their talking about you, these are cowards, and you're better off. I had a friend a while ago, but learned she was a backstabbing two-faced b....! I know it can be hard being in a new place and all, but be careful who you take up with. Do not let my past experience stop you, i just want you to be careful who you select as a friend. Walking alone in this world is sometimes the best, but it can be lonely at times, but at least you're not caught up in a lot of drama, and friends keep drama going.

    Answer by ambr2006 at 9:06 AM on Nov. 1, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.