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Am I that mean?

Last year, and a couple years before that my boyfriend did not do anything for my birthday. He always claimed that he got too nervous and didn't know what to get, and didn't have enough money to get me what he really wanted. We have been together for 6 years now, and have a four year old daughter together. I was obviously furious everytime he's done this. My birthdays in May, his was today. This year I decided not to do anything at all for him. I took the day off, but that was it. No card, nothing. Just like he's done for me. I guess my thoughts when he did it was that he could of at least made me a card! Now he's upset that I was vindictive and did it to him. Was I?

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Asked by cwaters13 at 1:52 AM on Nov. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Nope, I'd do the same thing.

    Answer by Blueliner at 1:58 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • Two or three times I'd put up with his behavior. Past three no way. Just tell him sweetie you taught me not to get hung up on our birthdays. Now go celebrate with your friends, mommy your growth in the relationship with him.

    Answer by lfl at 2:20 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • Gee, he's confusing. You should probably ask him how the Birthdays are celebrated in your relationship. You either do or you don't. I agree with your method. It's not fair when your the only one giving and it not being returned. Good job!
    And no, I think your smart, not mean.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:35 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • Well done. It sounds to me that he is rather lazy, and a little insensitive.
    Sometimes the most simple of acts are the most effective. Im sure he will have a lot to think about , good on you!

    Answer by dayle7 at 2:48 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • lol this happens with me and my brother and all i told him when he asked me what i got him for xmas was "the same you got me last year and this year for my bday'' he just laughed.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 3:20 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • haha I would of done the same!!! Boys are mean, and selfish!

    Answer by TristaAshlynn at 3:22 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • I wouldn't tell him I did it to him because he did it to me, I would just make a mental note to never recognize his birthday at all every again. No " I'm sorry's" no lies about cards, nothing, just treat it like any other day. Spend your birthday with your family or your girlfriends, the hell with him.

    Answer by jewjewbee at 9:04 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • Maybe he needs suggestions about what you'd like. Pick out a reasonably priced item and give him a big hint. Guys do get freaked out about gift giving, I think. AND, don't expect it to be wrapped, unless you count the bag from the store they purchased it. LOL

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 9:17 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • I would have done the same thing! He has been with you many years and it was pretty crappy of him to forget your birthday (for 3yrs) and then get mad cause you 'forgot' his? I would smile and say something like 'gee hon, I must have forgotten, just like you forgot my birthday for the past few years.'
    I have done that with my husband for fathers day-- he NEVER does anything for me on mothers day- not even saying 'happy mothers day' so fathers day does not exist in my house. I refuse to do anything for him when he obviously does nothing for me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:17 AM on Nov. 2, 2009

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