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Large gap between kids

I figured I was all done having babies. Then I got divorced when my DD was 4. She's almost 8 now and I am about to be remarried. We have decided to have at least 1 more baby, so my DD will be 9 or 10 years older than her sibling.

Does anyone have kids that are this far apart, or siblings this far apart? Are they/you close? was it weird? Do you think its harder having kids that are so far apart?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:20 PM on Nov. 2, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • My daughter was 11 when her baby sister was born. My older daughter is great with the younger one. She is old enough and independent enough to not be jealous of the baby. She is also a great help with the little one. She really loves her baby sister and is proud of everything she does; the little one really loves and looks up to her big sister. It is a great situation for my family.

    My advice would be to wait at least a year or two to start trying for a baby. It takes time for a step-parent/step-child relationship to evolve (doesn't matter how long you've been dating or how much they like each other - it will take time to become a family after you get married), and you want to be sure that is solid before you add to the mix.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • My older kids from my 1st marriage are 8, 9 (almost 10) and 12. They were 7, 8 and 11 when I had my now 11 month old.
    My older kids LOVE their baby brother, my daughter is such a little mommy. There was never a problem with jealousy, but I made sure to have special time with each of them before, during, and after the baby was born. They are very close to their baby brother and I hope they stay this way forever.
    It's hard, because my older ones are at an age where they want to go and do - go to the movies, the water park, the amusement park, etc and we can't always do that because we have to find a sitter for Noah. I worry that by the time Noah is old enough to do those things with us, my older ones will be at the point that they don't want to be with their parents anymore! lol It was easier when all my kids were close in age and "into" the same things at the same time.
    But they LOVE Noah! Good luck.

    Answer by missanc at 1:24 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • i have a 17yr old stepson who lives with me and hubby full time and a 17month old with hubby.there is a 16yr difference between his kids. stepon is sometimes mean to her and other times is kind of weird.

    Answer by angelairelan at 1:26 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • My kids are far apart. 9 years. It has its pros and cons- but generally speaking I think it is easier. I like having them at different stages of development. The older helps out with the younger one. The younger one idolizes her sister.

    My sisters and I are all far apart- 8ys & 12 yrs. I am 32, they are 24 & 20. We are all 3 close. I am probably a little closer to the 20 yr old than the 24 yr old cause our personalities are similar.

    Answer by ave.maria. at 1:27 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • I am 10-15 years younger than my siblings and when I was 9, they were all moved out and I felt left that I am older, we have more in common and talk more but it was lonely at home after they left on their own adventures.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:27 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • My sister and I are 11 years apart. She moved out and went off to college when I was 7. The first half of her childhood she was an only child and the second half of my childhood was like being an only child.

    It was weird. My sister is more like an aunt than a sibling. We aren't close and barely talk.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • I am the oldest. My brother Bob is 14 months younger and my brother Bill is 10 years younger. My brother Bill and I are much closer than Bob and I. (maybe less sibling rivelry) I love that we have that closeness. Don't worry about the age difference.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:46 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • My kids are (nearly)19, 15, 12, 4, & 3. I got remarried to a man who had no children so we had two. My older kids adore their younger sisters. They are a big help to me when I need it. I try not to ask too often of course, but having kids old enough to babysit is a real life saver at times! My older kids get along really well with my husband. They all like each other extremely well. We've been together 5 yrs. I'm was 34 when we had our first together (then nearly 36 w/ the 2nd one) & despite much effort we have been unable to have a 3rd child that we desire. If I had waited a few years we may have missed our chance so I am glad we had them quickly.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:58 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • My kids are 14, 6 and 4. The oldest and youngest are extremely close. They play - and also fight - a lot. Go for it!!

    Answer by mompam at 3:00 PM on Nov. 2, 2009

  • I am from a family like that....I'm 24, my brother is 19, my other brother is 16, and my sister is 12...

    Answer by OneToughMami at 4:25 PM on Nov. 2, 2009