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He wants to come home!

I have a 2 year old son, my ex and I do month on month off custody with him, we live 500 miles apart, in totally different states. Everytime I talk to my 2 year old hes begging to come home. I wish he could be here with me permanatley, but have been told I have to wait 3 years before I can go back and fight for custody. It's only been a few months, does anyone know if this is true? It breaks my heart to tell him he can't come home yet, and to count the days. I know he's not happy at his dads, even when he's here he begs not to have to go back. I know for a fact that they have no routine, for meals or anything, here we have all that. Is there anything I can do?

Answer Question
 
Alwaysacarnie

Asked by Alwaysacarnie at 9:00 AM on Nov. 3, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 9 (282 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Maybe try talking to your ex and see if you can make different arrangements...you both need to be concerned for the mental health of the child.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 9:05 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I would try to go back to the courts again. That dosnt seem right. They should have someone sit down with your son and talk to him about why he dosnt like it at his dads and why he always wants to come "home" refering to your house. If you cant go back to court i would still try to talk to them about it.
    Shelii

    Answer by Shelii at 9:05 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I would go back to the courts and get a child psycologist involved, also I would talk to his father
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 9:07 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I also say go back to court. A month off/on is rough on any kid......there can be no stability for your son with arrangements like. It's too confusing to be split between parents. I'd also ask your ex if you two can come to a compromise on the visiting because in the long run, this may be damaging to your son's mental health(as another poster pointed out) The psychologist is also a great idea. If they can prove that this is messing with your son's well being, the court will be more than likely to change it. Good luck to and keep us posted!
    how_reb

    Answer by how_reb at 9:18 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • 2 years old is too young to be shoved back and forth like this, I know it is probably impossible, but is there anyway you could move closer to the ex? I am sure it would be difficult, but maybe you could investigate--is your ex totally unreasonable to the fact that he is very little and needs his mom? God Bless you, I am sorry you are going through this
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:41 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Why do you have to wait 3 years to discuss custody? I've never heard of that before. I know you have to wait 3 years between child support modifications.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:48 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I don't think passing a 2 year old back and forth like that is healthy. This seems very wrong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:49 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Talk to your lawyer. that's a messed up custody arrangement. And you can revisit and try for custody at any time. Unless there is a reason you're not giving here, there is NO way anyone can make you wait for 3 years to revisit custody arrangements!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:43 AM on Nov. 3, 2009

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