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Do you accept invites from exes on facebook?

Why is it that when you start on facebook your exes seem to come out of the woodwork adding you as their friends? I have always prided myself on staying "congenial" with my exes, including my exhusband but it is strange that they add me as their friend.

Do you have your exes as friends on facebook? Did they add you or did you add them? Does it bother your SO? Are you bothered if you SO has his/her exes on facebook?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:02 PM on Nov. 3, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Just say no. They just want to see what you are up to.
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 12:03 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I figured it was probably something like "I wonder if she is a train wreck now" type of interest.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:06 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Haha, I just invited an old ex - the WORST break up of my life - to be my friend on Facebook. He accepted the next day. You know, it's been 6 years. Whatever. He was an important part of my life and generally a good person. I don't mind keeping in touch and I'm sure the bad blood is over.
    preggoandfat

    Answer by preggoandfat at 12:12 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • I have a couple of exes on my facebook/myspace profiles. One of them is one that we were good friends both before and after dating, so things have always been cool between us. The other is my high school sweetheart, and we didn't talk for years. We every now and then will comment or message each other, but mostly we just wish each other happy birthday and that's about it. As to who added who, one added me, and I added the other.

    I am just starting to see someone, and it doesn't bother him that my exes are on there. Partly b/c he himself is still friends with some exes and they are on his, and partly b/c my exes pages are public, so he can see that there is nothing going on from me to them, and since he is also on my page, he can see there's nothing going on from them to me. We also have agreed that trust is important to both of us, and that neither of us will do something that the other is uncomfortable with.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:15 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Preggo, If I was a therapist I would say...maybe you wanted closure and that was why you added him. ???
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • yep- and two of them are my bestest buddies, and have been for years. my lovely knows about them, i have nothing to hide from him... besides if he was curious, he would just go check.

    as for him, well... i dunno- i never cataloged his FB friends. lol i guess i really don't care.

    its not always the curiosity factor, some of us really are friends. :)
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 12:26 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • None of my exes have but if they did, I would probably accept, only because I'm nosy and want to see what they are up to these days. LOL! I wouldn't send them a friend request, though.
    Christina807

    Answer by Christina807 at 12:27 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Why not? They are "exes" for a reason. My DH has many of his exes (ex-girlfriends, not ex-wives, he was never married before) and they are also on my facebook friends list. It's such a hoot! They tell me things about him I had never heard and we laugh at the things he still does that are the same. I don't have any exes to add on facebook but it would work the same way. Just because you used to be in a relationship with that person, doesn't mean you can't be friends with that person or that your current SO can't be friends with them as well. We are planning a get together of my DH's friends (and now mine) for this spring, we are all bringing our kids and our SO's. A picnic in the park, friends, community... what could be better than that?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Heck no! I am not nor have ever been friends with ex boyfriends. DH is not friends with any of his exes *the list is short cuz I was his first sexual partner*. I would never have anyone I'd had sex with on a friends list out of respect for my husband. I mean, how would he feel to look at my page and see comments from them and have to think about the fact that they had me b4 he did? Those dumb @sses send requests all the time, too. One guy was 23 and I was 16 and I secretly dated him. So illegal! I can just see him explaining to his wife who I was..."oh this is the underage girl I had sex with all the time when she was 16..."
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:17 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

  • Haha, I just invited an old ex - the WORST break up of my life - to be my friend on Facebook. He accepted the next day. You know, it's been 6 years. Whatever. He was an important part of my life and generally a good person. I don't mind keeping in touch and I'm sure the bad blood is over.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    I recently connected with the worst part of my past as well. It has been seven years, there were some apologies made and some heated moments... honestly for me I think it has made it worse than it was before because now when I log on I'll see his face or see people posting things on his wall and it reopens the wound a little. My husband knows all about it. It's a difficult situation to be in.
    presleyfan1

    Answer by presleyfan1 at 3:00 PM on Nov. 3, 2009

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