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dO I FORGIVE HIM?

My bf of 11mths "we live together" was acting funny yesterday when he went to shower I went through his phone.There were text messages to his ex wife, like oh i thought id catch you wet after your shower, about 20 messages like that. there was one that said you know im kidding i do want us to be friends. she didnt say much at all to any of these lol, oh, yeah. things like that. well I left one up on the phone knowing he had to set his alarm. He comes to bed and says are u going to come here "im on my side". i said no im upset. what ever happend to our no sharing rule i asked he said i didnt it was mildy flirting and im not sharing. I said if you love me so much how could you? you dont allow me to talk to my ex's. he fell asleep. has worked alot. He has also asked her to cut his sons hair. I have packed clothes and left this morning,this morning before he left he kissed my head, the other day he was jealous.i need advice pleaz

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:26 AM on Nov. 4, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Um you did good girl, I would have milk his dumb ass! I am sorry! I would have got dirty and kept being nice and then have him watchin his back! But what you did will show you what he thinks... When you lose something valuable then you start looking for it that's how he should be with you! If he loves you the past should be the past! No excuses not even children! When you have kids and you divorce then your relationship is only those kids nothin more. He can't move on unless he let's go and keeping you on the rebound is stupid of him! Make him want you and miss you. Words are not enough cause his action says different... So have him show you but if he keeps on doing and you decide to leave again.. Don't come back cause if you do then you are the stupid one
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • Forgive him for what? I think the real question is whether or not you are willing to share your boyfriend with his ex-wife and his son. This is not a problem that is going to go away. They have a history together, and that history is a part of who he is. If knowing this and accepting it is too hard for you to do, then you need to tell him that and then wait for a man who does not have an ex-wife and children. I know that I would never be willing to share my husband with another woman, no matter who she was. I really think it goes against the very nature of a woman to be willing to share her husband. So you just need to decide what you are willing to tolerate and make your decision based on that. For me, it would be easy.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:36 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • you need to make your point that its not ok and you wont stand for it. Leave him? Prob not. Do you have kids with him? He is still flirting with her bcuz they are prob still friends. It's up to you.
    Mrs.Oriaku

    Answer by Mrs.Oriaku at 8:38 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • Well I would tell him that you read the texts and they upset you. He needs to be told flat out that if he wants a relationship with you, he needs to stop flirting with the ex, and keep all the communication with her limited to just about their child. I would tell him that he is a hypocrite- he made you cut ties with ex's while he is flirting with his. If he flirts with her or texts her again about personal things (or sexual innuendo) then I would consider dumping him and finding someone better.
    good luck
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • sorry girls i wasnt clear! they have no children together his son is another ladys and we have full custody of him does this change anything for your advice? please help
    mememecassie

    Answer by mememecassie at 8:57 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • If your BF has know kids with this EX you are talking about . He should not even be talking to her. Their is know reason for it.. that is What you should be telling him. Do not leave unless you plan on leaving for good. This break up make up thing does not work.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:04 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • Sounds like you're a rebound. I'd walk away.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:07 AM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • So much for being anonymous...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

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