Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

what do u mothers thing?

i have 8month old twin boys. i love them with all my heart. my mom and dad want me not to have anymore. my hubby and i do want more kids someday. im on the pill right now. his family say wait 5 to 10 years to have anymore. me and my hubby are young. im 20&his 22. but babies are alot of work. i want to have a little girl. but i dont know if i want to do the baby thing all over in 5 to 10 years.my body just keeps telling me to stop the pill and dont tell anyone.(i love being pregnant.) but i know right now things are tight and putting other baby in to it would make it harder. and the chages of having twins is so high for me and my hubby that when the doctor says we are. it not if its a girl or boy the thing will be how many?. my body wants a baby. i dont want to do the baby stuff again. i would like to have all the kids we will have now and them all be close in age. but noone but me wants a new baby right now. what should i do?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:49 PM on Nov. 4, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (8)
  • This is a decision that you and your husband should make. Unless of course you are living with your family. If you are living with your family, you should wait a bit until you can be out on your own. But it is still you and your husband's decision and not your parents. If you want your parents to decide everything for you then you should have remained single and at home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • You're 20 and you're married. You are plenty old enough to think for yourself and not let others tell you what to think. HOWEVER...stopping the pill without telling your husband is WRONG.

    The decision is between you and your husband. It is not between you, him and anyone else.
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 2:54 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • The biggest thing I think is waiting until your husband is on board with having another baby. I think it is deceitful and untrustworthy to go behind his back to get pregnant.
    Christina807

    Answer by Christina807 at 2:54 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • The World Health Organization recommends that all women wait at least 3 years before ttc. It's best for your health and its best for your new baby. Since you had twins you may want to wait even a little longe. If you had a c-section waiting 5 years might be a good idea.

    You are only 20! I had my last baby when I was 32. Its not unusual for women to have babies when they are in their 40s. You may be having babies when you are a grandmother. You never know.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 2:56 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • Take it from a young mom! I had my first daughter when I was 18 years old. I couldn't imagine having twins at your age and then wanting to have another one right away. I think that you should definitely give all of your undivided attention to your 2 blessings you have right now.. wait a couple years and see how you feel! The older they get, the harder they become, the wiser and the sassier they are! My daughter is going to be 4 years old in a month, and I just had another baby 8 weeks ago! It's your decision, but you have to make it with your husband... not behind his back! I would say to just give yourself and your husband time to adjust to these little ones before you jump back in the saddle again! Hope this helped!
    ali_1107

    Answer by ali_1107 at 3:08 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • thank u anyone. and me and my hubby. its hard to explan. we'er not married but we want to be. in own eyes we are. but do to own families saying we need to wait to get married. we have kids they didnt care about when we started wanting kids. but when it comes to getting married his family didnt want us to. my family didnt want anymore kids but they want us to get married. its hard on us. trying to be a family and one says grown and the other saying stop. so to me and my hubby we dont need a pager saying we'er married, we know in own hearts we own soul mates and we will one day have the same last name but thats not in the cards right now but we know it will be someday.
    angeltwinpain

    Answer by angeltwinpain at 3:21 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • well are you even of age? I mean if you are 20 years old, then you can legally get married without your families permission! If I did everything my family wanted I wouldn't be the person I am today!
    ali_1107

    Answer by ali_1107 at 3:37 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

  • You and your partner are the ONLY deciders in whether you have more children or not. Nobody, not family, nor friends can tell you whether to have more children or not. Whatever they believe is a mere opinion and noones opinion should be taken as a choice for you and your partner. When you and your partner feel you two are emotionally and financially stable enough to have more, then you make that choice. Let your family know that you respect their opinion, but ultimately it is up to you and your partner. Nobody else.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 6:47 PM on Nov. 4, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Babies (0-12 months)
cloth diapers and wipes

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
could be pregnant