Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Help..How do you set boundaries in a nice way?

My parents are driving me and my dh crazy! They live 45 min away and they want to see my 8 mo old dd every week...we made the mistake of letting them have her one weekend and ever since then they have been driving us nuts asking to keep her and we have let her because I NEED A BREAK, SLEEP AND TIME WITH MY DH but this has to steop. Just recently the past 3 times they have had her its been pretty much every other week they have had her and I have to stop it. They came over on Halloween to see her before we left for the fair and they ended up making us late so by the time we got there she was tired and fussy. They act like she is the only joy in their lives and its a little unhealthy Ithink I know she is their granddaughter but she is our baby.....

Answer Question
 
HayleyGM

Asked by HayleyGM at 8:09 AM on Nov. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • You're just going to have to be firm and clear. Tell them every other weekend is to much. Maybe suggest they take her the first weekend of every month- that way you and DH can count on it and occasionally go out and have some fun, and they know they'll have her again and can count on that.

    As for the Halloween issue, you may just have to be blunt to the point of rude. Tell them you are supposed to meet someone there at "x" time and stick to that time. Even if you have to stand up and leave mid-conversation, leave when you said you would.

    I get that they've become pushy about your daughter, but try to keep in mind (as they're frustrating you) how valuable it is to have grandparents who want to be involved.
    IrishMommaC

    Answer by IrishMommaC at 8:16 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • Wow... to have a child that felt like you do. Sigh.... Don't worry, you probably should enjoy it now, because once she starts walking, it's going to be a very different story, as they are just too much work to keep up with.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:46 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • Invite them to your house once a week. You pick the day and time. If they have a time set, they can look forward to seeing your child and they will bug you less.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:44 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN