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Has anyone else had this? Please help!

In a nutshell, I have had primary physical placement of my 3 children for 2years(since the divorce). I have always been the caregiver for EVERYTHING! Now he got a lawyer, and is going for 50/50 custody. I can't get a lawyer(family can't help either), I am meeting with the guardian ad litem on Monday to present to her why I feel the kids benefit from keeping the custody where it's at. He already gets them every weekend! He just finished paying child support for another child of his, and he and his new wife just had a baby, and he has constantly told me he is sick of paying me support. I know he is doing this so he doesn't have to pay anymore, but I am deathly afraid of only being able to see them every other week! They are my whole existence! Plus, he asks them if they want to live with daddy more.(they are 6,8,10) Of course, they are going to tell the guardian ad litem that they want that. Help!! dont know what to do?

Answer Question
 
My3RaysofSun

Asked by My3RaysofSun at 9:24 AM on Nov. 5, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 4 (36 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • does he live in your area? If not i would explain that it would be a problem getting them to school...and of course they would look at his other two kids
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:29 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • if he does...move further so it would be hard for him to get them to their school...like 30 mins away or something.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:31 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • Yes he lives within 5-10 min of me. Plus he lives about 2 blocks away from school! :(
    My3RaysofSun

    Answer by My3RaysofSun at 9:35 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • a judge would want the kids to have a stable home...they could'nt go to a different school every week and i doubt your ex would want to drive an 1 to get them their everyday...a judge would look at that. A judge would also look at how much of a player your ex is...who cares if he has a lawyer.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:35 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • MOVE!
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:36 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • He lives near the school they are going to. I don't want to uproot them to a different school. We are finally settled into a house and right now, I wouldn't be able to move in 5 days. That's when the hearing is!
    My3RaysofSun

    Answer by My3RaysofSun at 9:56 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • well if he only lives 2 blocks away its not that bad, they wont be that far away...the down side is that you wont be getting any child support and if you depend on that then that sucks. If you dont depend on it for paying bills and stuff then it wont be that bad....and ya know, more than likely your kids will get over there and things will be fine and dandy at first but with his new wife and that new baby i'm sure they will feel neglected and it will all go to hell for him and they will be crying to come home on his weeks.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 10:02 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • There should be free legal aid that you can get. I would look into it. Thats not right that he is talking to the kids about "wanting to live with daddy more" who talks like that to young kids! I am sorry you are going through this. I wish there was some actual advice i could give you im sorry. Please let me know how it all turns out.
    Shelii

    Answer by Shelii at 10:18 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

  • Let them go live with him, he has more than likely poisoned them, telling them how fun it would live with him, also you said---- and he and his new wife just had a baby, do you really thing she is going to be willing to or able to take your kids? Remember every weekend is a far cry from the day to day grind of four kids,( your three and their one) And they will also be missing you like crazy!! Bottom line it won't work and the kids will come back to you and your ex will be stressed to the max---which is alwasy fun to watch!!!

    If you move what reason will you give the judge---he will see right through it and know you are doing it to be nasty---unless you get a new job---good luck with this economy!!!
    blue_glass_mama

    Answer by blue_glass_mama at 11:00 AM on Nov. 5, 2009

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