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Do you really CARE how a stranger feeds her baby?

I personally don't. And I'm moderator of a breastfeeding group. But I know that not all moms can or will. And that's FINE.

What I care about is getting accurate information out there. So if I see an inaccuracy, I will provide the correct information. Sometimes that will help a mom. Sometimes it will confirm her resolve. That's fine.

The ONLY time I care is when a mom asks for advice on how to keep nursing, then ignores the advice and then says, "I couldn't do it." That's like my ten year old whining about missing video games when I told him to make sure he puts them away in the correct box every time. And unfortunately I've seen it happen.

But other than that...no skin off my nose how you feed.

And corollary to all of this...do you really CARE what anyone thinks of your parenting decisions? Especially a faceless stranger on the internet? WHY?

 
gdiamante

Asked by gdiamante at 8:30 AM on Nov. 6, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 37 (95,167 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (51)
  • I care more about the women out there who WANT to breastfeed and are sabotaged by medical "professionals". I care about getting good information out there in regards to breastfeeding so that every woman who can, will be successful and every new mom will able to make informed decisions. I do think this includes talking about the risks of formula, however... but I know some moms have different priorities and something else may outweigh those risks for THEM.

    I also think it's important to normalize breastfeeding so that people like anon 35 from page one don't see it as "offensive" to nourish a child anywhere. I'm certainly not going to stay in my house for 12 months so as to avoid having to feed my child is (*gasp*) public! The more who nurse openly, the quicker society will accept it as normal.
    LeanneC

    Answer by LeanneC at 12:47 PM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Pfft, no i've never cared
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 8:34 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Humans judge one another. It's in our nature.

    Saying you do not judge someone is like saying you don't fart. Sure it's an unpleasant trait, but everyone does it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:35 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Um, if you really don't care, why are you asking this question, making a statement that compares a mother to a ten year old. If someone can't breastfeed, they have reasons to believe that they cannot. I, personally, never felt like my newborn was getting enough. So, it turned me off of the idea. My daughter then had the same issue with her daughter... So, I would rather see a happily full fed baby then a starving baby because they aren't getting enough milk. I DO NOT JUDGE a mother for her decision SUCH AS YOU DID ABOVE. And, for the record, I do not care what group you do or do not moderate... but some women these days are using breastfeeding as a way of shock value, so to speak... they are using as a way to bare their breasts in public. Breastfeeding should be kept private.... Otherwise, it's just offensive.... NOT ONLY TO ME Deary, but alot of others and especially older adults..... SO GO FIGURE....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:35 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • I don't care how other people choose to feed their babies. Its really none of my business.
    shestolemyjello

    Answer by shestolemyjello at 8:37 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Yeah I care. I care if the poor baby isn't getting the best. But that doesn't mean I have the right to do anything about it. There is a difference between judging and keeping your opinion to yourself and being a bitch about it. And yeah if somebody asks for my advice and then doesn't care to listen then why waste my time.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:42 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Anon :35, you misunderstood the question. I asked it because of all the debate on another thread which you may not have seen.

    As to the analogy to my ten year old...let me put it to you this way, then. Someone says, "I want to lose weight." Their doctor says, "Eat right and exercise." They choose to do NEITHER and go back to the doc complaining that they haven't lost weight.

    Doc would be a tad frustrated, don't you think? I know that you can lead a horse to water but cannot make them drink.

    I too only care about the babies geting fed. (Happy? Making them happy isn't our job...otherwise we'd feed 'em noting but YooHoo and chicken nuggets and never send them to school!)

    I understand that people have reasons...I don't CARE about the reasons.

    What I'm trying to understand is why anyone else DOES.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 8:45 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • I don't care if a woman bf'ds or ff'ds as long as she is feeding her baby, but I will say that I knew a girl who made her own "formula" which was basically corn syrup and either condensed or evaporated milk, that is not healthy for anyone, much less a new baby (and he was faaat). But hey, if you can't trust a recipe for formula off the internet what can you trust to provide your baby with proper nutrition.

    And as for your corollary question, I really couldn't give a rats patootie what a bunch of random women on the internet think of my parenting decisions. I know that I've made the best choices I could for my family. They may not be the choices others would make, but for MY family they were the right choices.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 8:48 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • No nad I have never judged the way a person feeds their baby
    at least the baby is fed
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:52 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Yep. I care.
    Since having my own child I have deep-set emotions that overcome me when I see someone treating a child, feeding a child, touching a child or talking to a child in a way that I don't think is healthy.

    Although I would never dream of telling a stranger my thoughts on their parenting unless they either asked, or it was clear they were actually physically hurting their child.

    I have seen 3 month old babies being fed whole pots of chocolate mousse. I have seen overweight 1 year olds eating junk food. In hospital after giving birth I met a mother who instantly put her newborn of formula because she thought breastfeeding was for African women.

    Each of these things hurt my heart a little because I care for the health and wellbeing of children. So yes, I do worry about how other people feed their children. I don't have any reason to feel bad for that.
    ladysavage

    Answer by ladysavage at 8:56 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

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