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Were you worried about not being there for your dd when she "started" the first time?

This may sound silly. My dd is only 91/2 but I am already concerned about being there for her when she has her first period. She is wanting to go away to horsebackriding camp when she is 11. She won't be old enough to go till then. I am just concerned about her starting w/o me being there for support and to answer any questions she may have. Also a bit worried about her trying to go riding and swimming while having a period! I would appreciate your experiences and advice if you have been through the first period(or not) w/your tween. Some of my fear is coming from my own experience. My Mom was NOT there for me when I started. It was a bit traumatic. I had to tell my Dad. It was very embarrasing for me.

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Asked by momthruivf at 10:01 AM on Nov. 6, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 18 (5,284 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Before she goes to camp have a little chat with her and tell her you are sneaking in a few pads just incase. she will do fine as long as she knows what it is and has a few things to take care of it!

    Answer by ria7 at 10:06 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • Maybe you should start having the discussion with her now. My mom did when I was that age. She's really not too young right now. Anyway...when she goes to camp why dont you give her extra underwear and pads just in case and tell her how to handle things if it happens. My mom always had backup underwear and things that she kept in the car at all times. I would also tell her that it's nothing to be ashamed or embarassed about. I didn't even start my period until I was nearly 15 and I thought there was something wrong with me. We were wayyy over prepared! LOL. What are the chances she'll start at camp anyway? If she does it's really not the end of the world.

    Answer by lowencope at 10:07 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • I don't have a teenager (my DD is 11 years away from that) - but from my experience, it wasn't upsetting or confusing to me when I started my period when I was 12 and my mom wasn't there.

    My mom had already talked me through how it worked, and told me what to do, and my sister had given me the practical advice (you know, don't wear white pants, and always keep a sanitary towel in your bag at school for emergencies, lol) - and when I started my period I was living with my dad, and it was okay because I had alreay talked through it all with my mom and sister.

    So, just sit down and talk to her about it, and give her the practical advic, and it won't be a big deal to her if she starts it when you aren't there.

    Answer by ladysavage at 10:13 AM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • I think you got good advice about preparing her well in advance...You can't be with her 24 hours a day anyway. Try not to worry about it too much because all the worrying may make her think it is a bigger deal than it is...I know it is hard to deal with your little girl growing up in such a concrete way. I had a harder time with it than I thought I I understand.

    Answer by BJoan at 4:07 PM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • I didn't even want my mom to know. Unfortunately I had to tell her to get supplies.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:46 PM on Nov. 6, 2009

  • My dd got her first period this past oct ans she is 11 1/2 and thanksfully I talked to her all summer about what might happen and what she needed to do if I wasnt there to help her. When school started we went over things again and again and I was sure she understood (shes a little slow). I got a phone call from her one day at school for her to ask me how my day was and a little chit chat. When I asked why she wasnt in class she put her hand around the reciever ans said "Mommy I got my period." Im not sure who was more shocked her or me. I once again explained to her what she needed to do and had the nurse talk to her also. When she came home that night she gave me th biggest hug i have had in awhile and said i love you mom and thanks. I guess I did my job right. Just keep talking to her and make sure that if she still hasnt gotten it when she leaves then give her some supplies just in case. If shes prepared then shell be ok.

    Answer by tazamaraz96 at 7:01 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

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