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Help. What do I do when my DH only wants one more kid and I want more than that?

I am an only child and am living a life that is pretty lonely even though I am married. I don't want that for my child. But when we talk about having more he says that he only wants one more, but I want more than that. What do I do?

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Asked by lostdarkangel13 at 5:12 PM on Jun. 24, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 5 (72 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I wouldn't sweat it yet. A lot can change in the next few years. He may decide that he wants more. Good luck!

    Answer by Liz_24 at 5:27 PM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • He may change his mind in the future, sure, but has he given you a reason as to why he only wants one more? Maybe having a heart to heart with him and telling him your feelings and ask him about his might help? At least you'll know where each other is coming from and what is important to each of you?

    Answer by mommytoadam at 5:36 PM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • Have one child and see how things go tell him why you want more then one more and have him tell you why he does not. When the little one is running around learning to say daddy he just might change his mind. My hubby did.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:23 PM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • It's always best to err on the side of caution...if you think it through, would you really want to bring more children into the world that he really doesn't want? What type of father could he possibly be to those children? On the flip side, I understand as a woman the drive to have children (I have 4). You have a right to want more than he does. It sounds like you need to decide just how important that is to you. Unfortunately, there's not much room to compromise here-it would be nice if he could see how important it is to you and do this out of love, but if his heart isn't in it right now I wouldn't push it. Also, you might be the one to change your position after you have another one!
    I know this wasn't part of your question, but the red flag was raised for me when you said that your life is lonely and you want more children. You're married, and I'm sure your child is beautiful...what's missing? If you are willing to dig a little deeper, the answer might surprise you. Good luc

    Answer by musicmom77 at 11:06 PM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • When my husband and I where dating, I used to joke I wanted 5-6 kids. He honestly only want 2. Well, we have 4. The first was planned, the 2 pregnancy was planned, but I had twins, and the 4th wasn't planned. You never know what life's is gonna give you. Maybe you'll have another, and YOU decide thats enough.Don't worry about something that hasn't happened yet. PS.. I still talk about having a girl, you never know :P

    Answer by barrettboys at 11:14 AM on Jun. 27, 2008

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