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Need advice about family/thanksgiving

My husband wants to go to his grandparents for thanksgiving and I do not n I'm not sure what to say to him. FYI it's 3hr drive, their house is in horrible condition they don't have running water, dirt floors, she doesn't do dishes just wipes them down, house is very dangerous to my son they have a wood stove in the middle of the room, there's only walkin space throughout the house the list goes on. My son is 18m and last year when he went he was crawling n that was hard enough to keep him in my arms the whole time so he wouldn't get hurt/burnt but at this age it will be impossible. They have lived like this their entire life so my husband is used to going there but the dirtiness is to much for me they cook and bathe in lake water! It's so stressful thinking I'll have to spend another holiday there how can I convince my husband to not go? He says it's tradition.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:31 PM on Nov. 7, 2009 in Holidays

Answers (11)
  • You have your own little family now.....start a new tradition. Invite them to your house for the day or overnight.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 5:34 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • I feel for you. My DH has a ton of crazy traditions like this in his family and no matter what I say calmly, it starts a fight every time. Good luck to you. I'll never understand why men freak out about things like this and want to bring their babies into bad conditions like you described but mine does it too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:37 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • I don't understand it either I've tried so hard to throw other ideas out there on what to do for thanksgiving and I'm so tempted to just put my foot down and refuse to go but I really don't want to start a fight w everyone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:43 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • Your family (meaning spouse and kid(s), not extended family) comes first. He needs to understand that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:47 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • Put your foot down, it's not sanitary, it's dangerous, and it won't be a day of giving Thanks, it will be a day of holding a screaming toddler... Use the idea from the previous post, have it at your house, if they don't come then just have it for your family. If Hubby doesn't understand then I would tell him he's more than welcome to go but you can't. At least that's what I would do.. GL
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 5:55 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • Wow, dirt floors and lake water? Man, that's livin green! I agree with EireLass, start your own tradition and invite them to your place. GL momma!
    kenzie07

    Answer by kenzie07 at 6:09 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • I agree with MrsLeftlane. It isn't worth risking your little one's safety and/or health. Extend an invitation to the inlaws to your home.
    Robsmommy

    Answer by Robsmommy at 6:10 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • Well, flu season is here. Fake a little at the last minute.wink

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • Tell him to have a good trip
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:48 PM on Nov. 7, 2009

  • I don't know...you could like be honest with him.
    OneToughMami

    Answer by OneToughMami at 11:23 PM on Nov. 8, 2009

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