Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should my husband still be part of my kids life even after all he's done?

My husband left me a 1 1/2 ago for a younger woman after being married for 18 yrs and 4 kids. He's been in and out of the kids life as she doesn't let him see the kids because she is jealous of his communicating with me. Im blocked from his cell and whenever he is here she calls to tell me to stay with him. Now I was in court today to defend him because she recently pressed charges against her that he physically abused her after she through herself down a flight of stairs. She dropped the charges and he chased after her. We agreed that he would get an order of protection against her because she owns two guns which he didn't. He's now living with his grandma, lost his job because she created a scandal there and somehow still runs after her. What gives? I'm such a dumbass.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:37 PM on Nov. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I wouldn't want all that drama around my kids. I personally wouldn't let him be apart of the kids life especially if he can't get his stuff straight...jmo.

    Answer by kimosgirl08 at 5:44 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

  • I know this is easier said than done but could you ever move? Get a fresh new start. I know it would be really hard but this sounds like a situation you need to physically remove yourself from. Sorry you have to go through this and sorry that he has an emotional hold on you.

    You're not the dumb ass he is. I hope you know that deep down.

    Answer by Sara.Robyson at 5:44 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

  • I wish I could get a fresh start. He was such a great dad until she came into the picture and I can't see how she has so much control over him even after everything she's done to him. I beat myself for still loving him and don't want my kids to suffer because they love their dad

    Answer by living4mykids at 5:54 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

  • maybe your husband feels he has nowhere to go..could you possibly forgive him...i would still keep my guard up for a very long time but maybe give out a second chance and let him back in the house for the kids and try to start over...from scratch

    Answer by shay1130 at 6:08 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

  • if your children are over 12, they can chose for themselves. in my state thats the age a child is mature enough to chose if they even want visitation. i WOULD NOT let him around my kids with her around she sounds crazy, but he is their father i assume, so withholding the children isnt the best idea, itll hurt the kids in the end.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

  • Some men are just attracted to the drama of crazy women. I'd tell him the kids were not allowed around her but I don't think you can keep him from the kids. He has rights too.

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:43 PM on Nov. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
How can I fully forgive?

Next question overall (Pets)
my german shepherd...