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I'm so depressed....

I'm 31, divorced, and just plain lonely. I really want to meet someone to share my life with, but I just can't seem to find anyone. I was dating this guy for about 8 months and he treated me so badly. I've taken time to myself, I've had plenty of time to be alone now I'm ready to get back out there. I'm not ugly, I'm a little heavier than average but honestly I'm attractive and carry myself well. I have my own place, a good job, I go to church, I don't drink or smoke, I have no bio children ( I raised my SD, she still spends every other weekend with me), and I don't sleep around. I just can't understand why men are not attracted to me. It seems like EVERYONE around me has someone but me. I'm not rushing things, I'm just ready I guess. What should I do?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:40 PM on Nov. 11, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I am sorry that you are feeling so blue. I know there are good guys out there who are looking for someone to be a friend or to settle down with. Maybe take classes, or join a charitable or hobby group. Look for a friend first, emotional involvement can come later, after you really get to know him and find whether he really is someone you can like more. (((hugs)))

    Answer by Bmat at 1:48 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • pray and live your best life just stay busy and make others happy, you will be happy read Psalms 119 -God Bless watch movies to enertain romance till you find one of your own or read a good book!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:47 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Just go out and try to meet new people. Lots of times you have to test drive a lot of clunkers before you find that smooth running machine. You will find someone you just have to give it time. Make sure you are places where men are, talk to them all, and when you are least expecting it Mr. Right will be there. I know alot of people are against blind dates, but thats how I met SO, we have now been together 4 years, have a beautiful little boy and are happier than ever. Good Luck on your search.

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 1:49 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • I'm in the same boat, but a bit older than you. Come on over and have coffee with me. We can hang out and figure out what to do next! I have made the decision to stop being depressed about it and just have fun with my friends, married or single.    

    wink mini


    Answer by kjrn79 at 1:51 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Jr college we just hung out together. First figure Out what your about then find someone that shares that. With me it was technology. I was older, no small kids. overweight and according to statistics I had a better chance of being in a car crash, plane crash and hit by a train before I would find someone to marry me. Well did the first two but missed the train, now been married for 14 years and he adores me and I him. I had given up even.


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:57 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Can you say for sure because you can see into the future, that your sd will have a partner? No you can't. You wouldn't tell her either, if she came to you as a teen or young adult sad about no being married not to worry that she will get married. Would you?

    I have two daughters and a son. My two daughters I told about their periods saying that someday because of periods they might have babies grow in them. If they don't they're still good and worthy of loving themselves and other people and things in life.

    Focus on your life not on this part of your life being sad. Volunteer work is a great great way to learn strengths and to learn of one's own strengths. Public libraries have fantastic non couple groups that meet for all sorts of reasons- you're not restricted to only your local library. 4H in almost every county in each state has incredible groups,always looking for leaders, so are girl scouts. Look IN u not at u.

    Answer by lfl at 1:59 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • My joke I missed that train. He always responds I'm glad. Yes I was in a plane crash. Now it is time for our lunch chat. good luck. A song for you and all those so lonely.

    Vanessa Williams - Save The Best For Last


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:06 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • I am sorry you're feeling like this!!! My suggestion was that you live your life for you! People are more likely to notice you when your upbeat and confident than coming across as sad and needy. You want to meet a man who posesses those same qualities so that you can share and enjoy life not just spend time cheering up each other. Be the woman that other women want to introduce to their brother or cousin or neighbor! Believe in who you are and don't settle for less than that in someone else. And believe me, when you meet that incredible man, you will be so glad that you didn't waste all your "awsomeness" on men who didn't appreciate it!!! Be true to yourself, be good to yourself, participate in life with enthusiasm and you'll be surprised at what may happen!!!

    Answer by jessa1091 at 2:47 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Get yourself out there. Go out with friends. Meet people. Meet people through other people. Take an art class, or a class that forces you to talk & be with other people. You might not drink, but go to a bar with the gals one night. My brother, who is a good man met his wife at a bar. She was at a bachelorette party. You just have to get out A LOT! This is the best way to meet someone.

    Just DO THINGS! Anything that gets you around other people. You'll be suprised what life throws at you when you become an active social person.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 3:05 PM on Nov. 11, 2009