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Pregnancy: Too keep or not to keep. That is the question.

I am 27 years old. I married in April '09. I am 10wks pregnant. Neither I or my husband want children. I had an abortion in '98 & I've regretted it ever since. My husband refuses to stay with me with a child. He said there is nothing uglier than a pregnant woman. He wants me to divorce him and have an abortion and move back to Canada. Which is no small feat. He doesn't understand what I have to go through if I have an abortion. My situation is too complicated to comprehend. Any advice is appreciated.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:52 PM on Nov. 11, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (17)
  • Regardless of the pregnancy, you should divorce that bastard. What a piece of shit! The only thing uglier than a hateful person is... NOTHING.
    ecodani

    Answer by ecodani at 2:55 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • you dh is and idiot!1 dump the pest and keep your baby. divorced him and leave him. he isnt man his an asshole!!
    piwife

    Answer by piwife at 2:56 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • First think about what you want to do, and then worry about how your husband fits into that plan - don't let him force you to do something you don't want to do. You've been through this before and regretted it - do you want to feel that way again?

    "He wants me to divorce him and have an abortion and move back to Canada."

    This makes it sound like your marriage is over whether you keep the baby or not, so really think about what YOU want.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • That is not a man I would want to spend my life with. This sounds like someone who would drop me when the going gets rough. I would adopt the child out rather than have an abortion.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:57 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • ok i agree that divorce would be best in this situation. :( i'm so sorry but it sounds like your husband does not care about you. i also think abortion would be very bad for you since you have already said you strongly regret your abortion from 11 years ago. but you also said you do not want children, so adoption sounds like a good option for you. gl sweetie!
    Stefanie83

    Answer by Stefanie83 at 2:57 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • He sounds like an ugly man, he doesn't deserve your love. I would divorce him and if you don't want the baby give it up for adoption.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:58 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • You know what you felt with your first abortion and you have to ask yourself if you want to go through with that again. Your husband is making you choose between a child and him, and that is a choice you will live with for the rest of your life. Take some time away if you can. Stay with a relative or friend...even if its just for a weekend or week. You don't want to feel pressured into making a decision. My heart goes out to you. I am not for abortion but regardless of that I'll be praying for you.
    Aside from the choice, I can't imagine a good loving man forcing his wife to make such a choice. He aided in this pregnancy. That is so sad.
    MamaChamp

    Answer by MamaChamp at 2:58 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • if my dh would have tol me that, i would have slapped the crap out of him and thrown his clothe sout the window. WOMAN YOU ARE 27!! A BIG GIRL TELL HIM TO F OFF A ND BECOME A MOM IS THE GREATES GIFT EVR!!
    piwife

    Answer by piwife at 3:01 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • get rid of him. move away from him & have your baby & be happy! you deserve it. he sounds mentally abusive to say such things to you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:01 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • The love you think you feel for this man is absolutely nothing compared to the love you will feel once you have your baby. Ask most any mom and they'll say they never knew they could love like this. You and your baby would be so much better off living a happy life without this man. He seems to have no love in his bones. You deserve better and so does your precious baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:09 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

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