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please forgive me this is more of a vent than a question...

The past few month have been very hard for me. i feel like my worl is crashing down on me. I am a single mother due to divorce. since i left i have gotten my Ged ..gotten back on my feet have held a job for almost two years and am now attending college. I am so frustrated today..i lost my father less than two weeks ago. and having a very hard time dealing with this. i have had to drop half of my classes because i got behind during my bereavement. and am now facing a job change i am miserable at my job and i am sooo sick of people not doing their jobs and gettign away with it. i get stuck picking up the slack. but when i forget something little that take less than 5 min to make (i am a cook) they go and cry to a manager. these people i feel as tho they are singling me out because we dont get along. these two people have been there for like 15 some odd years so they get away with anything. i am so sick of everything going wrong

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:19 PM on Nov. 11, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (6)
  • oh op, I'm sorry about the loss of your dad. Maybe start a book of memories of how helpful and funny he was at different ages in his life and your life, and to other relatives maybe include friends too? You could circulate it through email. One of my kids is going for a degree through out community college distant learning - everything's done on line for class learning - some times tests are on campus. Since that's been started things are way easier for her. Maybe you can look into that?

    Most community colleges also take out of county students, sometimes at a high cost. Also her community college and another one I know of have a club that meets (I don't think it's officially part of the college but meant to encourage women to take charge of their lives), the club rather group is Displaced Homemakers. Try googling that, maybe it'd help you. Maybe a church has women who could watch any kids to give you a break?

    Answer by lfl at 9:28 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Think positively. Things will get better.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:37 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Well first of all cudos to being a single mother, getting your GED, going back to school, and holding a job! Second I am very sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. Maybe you should take a simester off to get your head back in the game. Take one day at a time. I know what you mean about feeling like your world is coming in on you. and its hard to feel like its going to stop. Try to stay positive and rememebr that you have a little one looking up to you. As for work i would either talk to your manager or look for something else. I have been in those shoes before the woman with the longer time ALWAYS win! It sucks but it happens! Or stick it out do your job and show them that you are there to work and not make friends! Good luck sweetie and if you ever need you vent you can send me a message!

    Answer by babymaddy at 10:11 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • You are still going through a grieving process. That's so stressful and things that wouldn't normally bother you, do. Things that usually bother you, make you crazy! The slackers and tattle talers you describe would be in that category! I have been through work situations that were unbearable more because I wasn't taking care of myself emotionally and physically than anything else. I couldn't keep it together there because I wasn't dealing with the real problems in my life. Give yourself time, a break, don't take more on and let go of the things that someone else can do. Find ways to work through your feelings, to have rest and fun. Do what you can at work and let the rest go. Take good care of yourself and make sure your needs are being met during this difficult time. Things do get better with time if you address what is really bothering you. I am sorry for your loss. Been there.

    Answer by happi-ladi at 10:17 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • OP here..i tottally agree with you i know it is the passing of my father that has me so is not something i expected he died suddenly of a heart attack. alot of other thing be3fore had been building up but i was doing well with dealing with them. since he passed away less than two weeks ago. i have been a mess. sometimes i am fine one minute and crying histerically the next. some day i wake up soooo angry and dont even know why. and some times i am just fine. I miss my father very much. i had grown very close to him the past few years. when my marriage3 went bad he came half way across the country to get me and my two young children. i for some reason have the day he died playing over and over again in my head. and i cant seem to stop it. today was my first day back at work. thank you all for talking to me. i just feel so alone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • First off Im very sorry about the passing of your father. Just take the time to embrace the years you had together, as a family. He will forever be in your heart just as you will be in his!

    I agree too about taking the time off from school. Just wait to go back to school, as it will be there. And as far as work, speak with your manager and say you appreciate your job responsibility but feel you are doing others work as well and you need to concentrate on yours as you do not want it to hinder your performance as you believe your performance has been your main priority.

    ***Does anyone have any advice on what she can say to her boss?*** I am not sure how to really word it.

    Not sure what job change you mean, whether the same place now or are you leaving to go to another job?

    Take care and know it will get better. Good luck with everything. Kudos to you for what you have accomplished so far!

    Answer by LilyPondOasis at 1:04 AM on Nov. 12, 2009

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